The ABCs of Life

Goodbye

2007-08-09T12:15:00.000-08:00

At last, it's time to say goodbye to this blog, and to lukluk ...

From today onwards The ABCs of Life will be moving to my own domain at nurinmz.com/blog. So dearest friends and readers, please update my link on your blogs/websites to nurinmz.com/blog. I really do appreciate your valuable time and support throughout my blogging days here. Keep on reading and see you at nurinmz.com/blog!

talk about babies [part 8]

2007-07-29T12:12:00.001-08:00

Just a quick one. UPDATED!

- Handzalah is now able to recite du'a (prayer) before eating and sleeping and say at least Bismillah before getting things into his mouth/drinking. I've recorded his eating du'a recitation but I don't think I'd put it up here anyway ... sorry! He's reading the Qur'an together with me nowadays, immitating the end sounds for every ayah ;)

- He's telling me he needs the potty and successfully controlled his bowels before reaching the toilet ... yeayyyyyy Alhamdulillah! He even asked for another go while he's in the bathtub brushing his teeth. On the potty he said "we can't poo/wee in there (the tub), we poo/wee here"...hehe pandaila anak ummi ni. But that's just a start to a diaper free future :D .. there's a long way to go, allahumma yassir

- My little bubbly girl is currently enjoying her voice making noises and the ta-ta-ta all the time. She's also been trying to immitate her brother's acts and to prove this hypothesis of mine I tried asking the little boy to teach her sister to wave bye bye and to my surprise she immediately tried waving! She's following him all the time, rolling to his side and 'talking' to him every now and then ... and she's not on her two feet yet or I bet they'll be running around day and night ;).

A visit to the doctor

2007-07-27T02:38:00.000-08:00

We went to the GP on Wednesday and met Dr. Coates. Dr. Creagh is supposedly on holidays or else I would have made that appointment with her but Alhamdulillah, Dr. Coates was just as nice as she is. I made one appointment though I did request for another (for me and both little fellas) as that was the only one available according to the receptionist (or whoever was on the phone) for the day.

The appointment was at 1220pm and we were there earlier but as usual, get to see the doctor much much later than the promised time. I wonder, at this period of the year - the end of the convocation week and the beginning of summer holidays - could there still be some many people needing the University's Health Service? We waited in the lounge with only another girl who seemed to be waiting for quite some time, I think. As she looked so vulnerable on the couch and at last rang the reception bell to suddenly change her address? Whatever-lah. Nevertheless, Handzalah enjoyed the waiting playing with blocks at the little play area provided in the centre. He's usually stuck on the toy horse but today the blocks were by far more colourful and interesting. Maybe because they were all around the floor when we came in.

Minutes elapsed and at last the door opened and my name was called by the GP herself. Handzalah the Builder was so into his 'building', it took some time to get him to the door. I told him it's time to go but this kind hearted fella wanted to keep the blocks in the box - tidying up - first before leaving. But there was not much time for that so I told him that we can get back to that later (they weren't even in the box at the first place, but thank God Alhamdulillah, he does have a sense of responsibility and care even they weren't his).

In the doctor's room, I told Dr. Coates about the problem all three of us had for the past one week. She said she'll give me a check but I'll need to try and get separate appointments for the kids. But that was the only available appointment for the day and I made it on my name because I thought it won't make any difference as if it does I would surely put my children's then. She made a quick check on the computer and told us that a few other docs had a few available appointments but again, there were none when I called this morning! Well, I can't blame her nor the receptionist, I know about their big problem there. The 10 minutes per appointment scheme happen not to work as planned as many patients took too much time for consultation?! And that's why I requested for another appointment at the first place.

The doc gave me a check and told me it's NOT hayfever because you won't have fever with hayfever though the name indicates so ;). And further, there won't be any swellings/swollen glands with it. It's actually a cold virus which has been affecting the area at the moment. No antibiotics or medication would be any good but doses of paracetamol would help to relieve the fever and discomfort. After the brief check, I asked whether I could treat it the same way with my children, and to my relief, Alhamdulillah, she kindly said she'll be examining them both afterwards. Gee, that was a real relief! Can't imagine having to leave her door to get more appointments from the receptionist and see another doctor ... the little boy - as usual - cried all the time when the doc's examining him. Wise doc gave him a sticker and switched on a moving elephant. The boy was happy with the toy but not happy enough to settle down quietly during the examination. He even tried getting another sticker and the doc gave him another one which Ummi pasted on her little sister's tee. And the sticker actually says "I was good at the doctor's today" ;). Fidaa' at the other hand - as usual - was all macho and interested in things. She was very quiet tolerating the quick process.

I've made an appointment for the little girl's Hep B jab next week but the pharmacist had some trouble with the prescription. She told Abuhandzalah we need to pay for it and there's no specification in the prescription on whether it's the 16pounds or 60pounds jab. Hmm ... that's so expensive for a Hep B jab! I could get it cheaper back home kan?

I'm just another makcik

2007-07-24T12:33:00.000-08:00

I know, I know ... you won't be able to understand nor enjoy this note unless you could understand Malay/Bahasa Malaysia. But I have no intention to make a translation for it shall spoil the purpose and fun of it! Anyway, 'makcik' literally means aunt which is also used widely to address an elderly woman in Malaysia ...

Now I'm just like any other makcik
with two hands full of beg plastik.
The weight I usually carry
will almost impossible to help me lari
if there's any emergency
though wholeheartedly I'll protect the isi.

I'm just another makcik
though I could spend hours dressing up
it'll simply take a second to make me ugly
just try a mouthful sneeze
or a spoonful spilt curry
these cute little monsters just can't help
protecting me from being too pretty.

I'm just another makcik
hands full caring for two budak kecik
sometimes turning into a manic
when these kids innocently
buat dunia tunggang terbalik
but being another makcik is worth the panic
when those happy little laughters and smiles
turn on the lights of worldly bliss.

After all,
being a makcik entitles you to happiness
more than what you can imagine
beyond... your wildest dreams!

ummi a.k.a kew,
2007, fd

If you're a mom like me, to angels-cum-monsters like my little darlings, you might have the same feelings at times ;).

p/s: Please pray for us at home ... we're terribly sick, looks like it's hayfever but going to the GP this evening to know for sure. My poor little fellas, allahuyashfeekum!

talk-about-babies [part 7]

2007-07-15T22:10:00.000-08:00

Fidaa' is 6 months old now. I've given her solids - fruit purees and baby rice - at 5 months as she has been showing signs of needing more than just milk: she's still unhappy after a good milk feed, very interested in our eating activities - she might even try grabbing a spoon or biscuit from our hands - and she's doing this 'chewing' motion every now and then, and her dribbling/drooling has significantly reduced. She's able to sit on her own without support for a few seconds, or longer if she's not overly distracted with things around her now. Seems like she enjoys sitting a lot more than lying on her back so we usually help her sit propping her back with pillows and let her play with Handzalah's Fisher Price touchpad we bought a year ago. This educational toy is quite expensive but I think it's a good investment for a child. She loves to suck her thumb (or few fingers at times) and pulls other people's hair! :)

Fidaa' rolls from her back to get on her tummy and vice versa like a pro now and just like Handzalah, she moves faster backwards when she's on her tummy, mengesot sikit-sikit. She'll be all over the floor in a second. And when she's on her tummy nowadays, she'll hold her head up high and sometimes acting 'manja' putting her head down on the mat and making soft little sounds. Aha, she' also experimenting with various pitches and tones of her voice. Sometimes it's like she's screaming all the way down her throat, just for fun other than making bubbles out of her saliva. Sometimes it sounds as if she's singing along with Handzalah, whom of course loves music very very much!

You should see how both of them interact with each other. Handzalah usually joins Fidaa' on the bed or mat when she stares at him and they'll start "communicating". Handzalah will do the talking and Fidaa' will usually reply with all the "ooh-aahs" sounds. At times, Handzalah will pause to ask, "Ummi, adik cakap apa?" (Mummy, what is she saying?) and you thought he'd understand because Ummi doesn't ;). No such thing as babies understand babies ah? I'm always worried when Handzalah is jumping up and down near her sister and will ask him to stop and do it somewhere else, but Fidaa' will be overjoyed and laughing heartily to his brother's acts giving her Ummi's disapproval less reasoning. Handzalah is also OK when it comes to sharing his things; toys or even his favourite *apple with his little sister. It's a joy seeing them happy having each other's company, as if they're yet too young for rivalry but there are times when the big brother does things like sitting on her sister simply to play around or the other no-nos just to seek you attention, so beware!

Handzalah is now able to pronounce more and more words clearly though he still have troubles with the letter R and L and apple is still 'apen' to him :). He's uttering long sentences and telling stories of his own experience and has recently develop a new communicating habit: he asks and he answers on his own! He'll ask "Buat apa tu?" (What are you doing?) and automatically replies "Oooh, Ummi masak nasi" (Oooh, Ummi's cooking). And oh, the long OH is simply compulsory. The funniest thing about this cheeky litte hearthtrob is whenever he's interested in something we actually know he really likes and usually asks for, he won't just ask for it. He'll make an opening remark for his indirect request and it usually starts with Wow - "Wow! Kita nak makan aiskrim", "Wow PDA, Abi main PDA ke?" and aha he can now pronounce PDA as it is :). He also managed to pronounce computer properly and at last the word 'octopus' in it's proper form. He used to say 'ocpetis' and we're still not sure why.

He can take off his own clothing now but still struggling to put things on and he has just discovered that his diapers can get wet and he can now tell that it's happening. He loves brushing his teeth and will ask for his brush everytime he's in the toilet for a wash but still try to avoid having his hair washed or shampooed! NEWS: We've just cut his long, semi-curly wavy hair yesterday. We actually wanted to get it really short using 'the machine' but when he heard its sound he cried and screamed "Aku Maluuu!!!" (I'm ashamed) ... err, what was that for and what in the world was he ashamed of? Huhu ... he might have gotten the wrong expression ey? After a few minutes of consoling and 'jelly-bean-ing' (yeah, I know sweets-baits are a crime but that's the best we can afford then :D) he agreed to have his hair cut with a pair of scissors :). Any other tips friends?

* I'm not feeding her apples, not until it's pureed but I do let her have a taste of the fruit; just like soothing her gums with cool teething rings, you can alternatively use carrots or like me, an apple. Just be sure she won't get a bite and choke!

If you're new here you can read my previous entries on TAB here. Enjoy! :)

The Job Predictor?

2007-07-10T20:06:00.000-08:00

Adnin sent me the Job Predictor :wink: where your name dictates your profession? Since I didn't have much time to seriously post something now, I thought of just telling you my job "prediction" results. Just for fun! :)

I typed in my First Name and my Ideal Job is a &8%^# Star???! What is this thing? Ridiculously ridiculing ...

Then I typed both my First and Middle names since I think that'll give a better, unique result and hence, my Ideal Job is a Prime Minister!! Gee, sounds sensible at last! :D

And since there's more than one person with both my names, to make it utmost unique, I typed in all my names including my Surname, and my Ideal Job is ... a Supermodel?!!

I've told you, this is ridiculously ridiculing yet very, very interesting. Do you know what's behind such thing?

Anyway Adnin, thanks for giving me a good laugh this morning :). If you'd like to know what's your job according to your name, try the Job Predictor today. Good day peeps!

Salam ...

Tagged for charity!

2007-07-03T20:04:00.000-08:00

This is the first time ever I'm responding to a tag :).

I'm sorry if I've been a bit ignorant about this recent 'tagging' trend in the internet community. Anyway, to sis Raiyan, thanks!

For everyone's information, this is a great tagging game, meant for charity. For every tag responsebefore 26th August 2007 , Idham - the initiator - will donate RM127 to Darul Izzah Orphanage, Bandar Baru Bangi, Malaysia. Meaning, by doing this meme you'll be donating RM127 to the orphanage (with his money though :D). He's targeting at least 100 bloggers to get about RM1k for this chosen charity of his! And the rules are (copying and pasting from the original rules from Idham's blog) ...

If you are tagged, you need to write an entry related to the meme. At the end of your entry you just need to tag as many person as you like. You will then leave a comment in their blog to let them know they have been tagged. And to include this message, "By doing this meme you are contributing rm127 to the Darul Izzah Orphanage". Then please copy and paste this rule somewhere in your entry.

The meme is about completing at least seventeen out of the following twenty seven sentences........which I have completed in bolded black ink. *These can be copied and pasted to your entry*

When you have done yours, please leave a comment in here - so that Idham can keep count.

1. A person is only as good as what he/she is.

2. Friendship is always meant to be like a ship on the sea. Every relationship is.

3. To love is to give, to accept, to appreciate and to sacrifice.

4. Money makes me want to spend ;).

5. I miss my family back home, school and friends!

6. My way of saying I care is by doing anything I think suits the purpose and the person.

7. I try to spread love and happiness by caring, sharing and WRITING!

8. Pick the flowers when they fell? I don't pick them from where they're best placed by God's grace :).

9. To love someone is to give what you've got and enjoy what he/she is about and embrace one of the bestest gift from God.

10. Beauty is what God creates but we failed to perceive most of the time.

11. When I was thirteen, what I remember the most was the birth of my
'unexpected' baby brother! :)

12. When I was twenty one, I remember mostly everything then!

13. I am most happy when my loved ones are pleased, utmost happy!

14. Nothing makes me happier than knowing I'm just another person that God made special and loved!

15. If I can change one thing, I will change everything bad into kindness.

16. If smiles were good enough to cure pain then I shall smile to every eye I could face.

17. Wouldn't it be nice if we could have the world the way we want it to be?

18. If you want to succeed then you have to learn, give your best and compete!

19. Money is not everything but it gets everything people are really dependant on.

20. The most touching moments I have experienced is whenever my mother talks to me personally, when my husband first talked to me, when I gave birth to my babies, when somebody appreciates me, whenever I'm with good company and when I finally learn to appreciate myself.

21. I smile when well there's too many instances and events that should be
decorated with a smile, can't specify just one :).

22. When I am happy, I'll do everything I can at my best.

23. If only I don't have to need money, then I'll have lesser worries. The world too, I believe ;).

24. The best thing I did yesterday was entertaining my beloved family.

25. If I ever write a book, I will give it this title,"'' ......." I'm never good with titles!

26. One thing I must do before I die is repent, should do it every now and then too!

27. Doing this meme, I feel like I'm a part of a great cycle that's hoping and working for a better world, for all of us!

And now I'm tagging:
1- my other half; significant other
2- Lieawulf
3- tink3rb3ll
4- kak Baiti
5- Adnin of phantasmagoria
6- Sheera my once upon a time 'anak usrah'
7- Am, my best friend
8- Aran, my skoolmate
9- Samwan, my momsunited mate ;)
10-Nad my junior
11- Sapphire Knight, a Malaysian problogger? :)

Rite. Let's not stop here. I'm tagging every eye who's a blogger, reading this entry here! Come on guys, this is FOR CHARITY! May Allah bless and help us all :). Good day peeps!

The 1st month in SMS

2007-07-03T20:02:00.000-08:00

Subhanallah walhamdulillah, it has been three weeks since the 1st class started. We had three classes so far and I'll say students' attendance and parents' support have been great! As promised, I'd jot down some of the lessons I've taught for Group 1 (aged 4-6) in two weeks time.

p/s: I didn't handle Group 1 last Saturday because I needed to substitute Wan teaching Malay Language for Group 2 and 3 and Kak Yati is back in Soton to "look after" those energetic beings. It was a good "change", a short relief. It was easier in the sense that I needed less energy to teach the older kids. With Group 1, you need all the energy and voice you have, with the correct tone and "pitching" and also attractive activities to "keep" them learning. If you're not really prepared, you'll be surprised to see them "everywhere" at a blink of an eye! :)

Week 1:
Objective - Ice Breaking (Introducing school, friends and Malay language), Etiquettes of a Muslim

Methodology : Circle Time & Activities (30 mins)
- Begins with "Bismillah". Teacher greets students, welcome them to class. Ask them about their activities before coming to school; did they brush their teeth in morning, had breakfast, etc.
- Introducing oneself. Begins with "Assalamu'alaikum", "My name is ...", "I am _ year old". Teacher introduce herself and ask each and every student to do the same.
- Teacher tells how and when to give Salam and reply, the importance of starting a job with bismillah and ending them with alhamdulillah.
- Chat about school, remind them about next class. End with du'a.

Activities:
- Story telling
- Songs: Pok amai-amai, Alif Ba Taa
- Labelling folders with students' names

Week 2:
[Islam] Objective - Revision & Knowing Allah

Methodology:
Circle Time and Evaluation (30 mins) - Ask students about their day before school and what they remembered from the previous class. Remind them about lessons of week 1. Introduce "Allah the Creator", ALlah makes everything. Relate the etiquettes learnt as obedience towards the Creator.

Evaluation & Activities (30 mins):
- Teach the song "Bismillah" to help remembering last week's lesson
- Ask children to think of what Allah creates around them, draw them. Each of them will need to show their friends and teacher what they've drawn.
- Teacher marks the drawing and reward stars. Return to students, teaching them to thank people upon receiving things by saying "Terima Kasih" (thank you)

[Malay] Objective - Revision & Identifying Objects

Methodology:
Circle Time - Revise how to introduce oneself in Malay. Ask them to tell stories and how do they feel about school so far.

Games & Activities :
- Teacher draws an object on the whiteboard and students will need to guess what it is in Malay.
- Sing Pok amai-amai
- Show children how to make a paper butterfly, and ask them to colour their own butterflies. Paste in notebooks.

My version of Pok Amai2 :)
"Pok amai-amai, belalang kupu-kupu,
Belajar pandai-pandai, jadi orang berilmu"

Ok, that's what I did. I hope I'll make time to write on some assessment and observations for month numer uno. What do you think friends? Comments please ... :)

Notes: All classes are conducted in Malay Language.

Changes

2007-06-27T08:08:00.000-08:00

I bet you've been thinking what am I up to tweaking this blog every now and then, changing this and that all the time. Huhu, this is not the look that I wanted for my blog. I want something simple but with a personal touch and creative spark that'll last in your minds. Unfortunately, my blog advisors have yet to return with results huhuh .. Me, and my limited tech skills, are struggling to make this blog at least look 'sensible' to the viewers including me!

Any ideas how I can transform its looks back to home sweet home?

Ummah Films

2007-06-27T06:10:00.000-08:00

Have you heard about Ummah Films before? Watched one of them - The Parent Negotiations - while browsing through iluvislam.com recently. This cynical one man show seems sensible in most of his message. I don't want to comment further, watch them yourself, and let me know what you think about them - the content and the presentation. Does this type of approach could get things straight to your minds and souls?

To make things easier why don't we just vote, do you like it? YES or NO ? Lengthy comments are always welcome though :)

Plan Your Vacation with HotelReservations.com

2007-06-25T15:03:00.000-08:00

Planning for a vacation this summer? Searching for cheap hotels? Or thinking of a getaway anytime in the future? Plan it with Hotel Reservations.com and get discounts to save up to 70% off on hotels, motels and resorts!

This site offers a comprehensive tool to vacation planning with complete accommodation and transportation packages. There's a wide range of choices for vacation packages and rentals; hotels, cars and flights to select, according to quality, price or the best value within the site itself. Look for top quality hotels to stay or one that suits your budget. Book a flight and rent a car to and fro your destination. Check out the great destinations for sightseeing and activities available to suit your interest and fulfill your family's request. If you're thinking of not overspending this holiday, look out for the special internet rates available and the rebate deals offered. They guarantee the lowest rate for booked reservations and you could claim the guarantee if a better offer matching the same criteria of your booking details could be found. The best part about HotelReservations.com for bloggers or webmasters is, you'll get paid to write and create some Buzz about them!

HotelReservations.com provides everything you need for a hassle free and headache-less holiday preparation. Even if you are not into the holiday mood yet, the site would be a helpful tool for your business journeys and events around the world. What about weddings, reunions or special events to commemorate those special bonds and memories? HotelReservations.com is only a click away for help with Group Bookings with a special price. So what are you waiting for? Visit HotelReservations.com now and plan your best ever holidays! Don't forget to bookmark the site for future reference. And if you have a blog, start writing about HotelReservations.com now!

Are you a mom to be?

2007-06-22T13:42:00.000-08:00

Or a mommy?

Let's share some thoughts at Maternity Ideas: Clothing, Books and Tips. Hop on for a read and let us know what you think.

The blog is fairly new thus will need a lot of time, ideas and support for improvement. Kindly leave your thoughts please. Happy reading :). Thanks!

Make Your Own Playdough - the Return!

2007-06-22T13:14:00.000-08:00

Friends have been asking me about making their own playdough at home after reading my post on the recipe some time ago. I'd like to remind you that the dough will only last for a period of time. No, not because you can turn them into currypuff afterwards. And no, it's not going to melt for no good reason or disappear through the process of vaporisation.

The dough would not last forever (nothing does) as it is made without any preservatives. Just like any other dough you make into pastries etc., the dough will deteriorate after a few weeks. Use a cheap flour if you worry about overspending. Well, flour is actually cheap enough though.

The idea in this is actually thriving excitement in making things on your own, from scratch. Perhaps, you'll get to give your child some time and space in the kitchen to work together with you and your 'toys' rather than shooing them away when you're busy in the 'office' with the ladles and pans. Your child will also learn a bit about dough making and the great thing about playing with doughs and blocks is it does help expanding their creativity. The only possible downside for it is, it's not long-lasting thus dough-playtime will need to have a break until you get another pack of flour and other items in the recipe to make some more! :)

Oh and makesure the dough has enough of everything to make it nicely playable and won't run out of shape and colour. Dry your masterpieces under the sun, that'll make them hard to retain their moulded shape. Then, you'll need to worry less about the expiry date!

Any other better ideas to keep the dough playable all the time? Other than buying Play-Doh please ;).

If you've missed the recipe, read Make Your Own Play Dough Recipe here now!

1st day at SMS (part 1)

2007-06-22T11:04:00.000-08:00

Saturday, 16th June 2007 was the first day of operation for Sekolah Malaysia Southampton (Malaysian School Southampton). I had butterflies in my stomach, waking up that morning for it was my first day in school and like any other kids, this first time tutor was soooo excited! I've been wanting to post about our 1st day at SMS since the day itself, but we were busy all weekend and the kids were not well. They're recovering now alhamdulillah. I'm trying to make this short but InshaALlah interesting enough with some photos. Enjoy reading!

We started with a simple registration process for the children. Collecting all the forms and registration fees, checking the attendance sheet and distributing 'starter-packs' for the lovely kids. Each and every one of them got their own Snopake folder containing the most essential tool for school; a notebook and a pencil. Alhamdulillah, many of the parents turned up with their children for our first ever debut in SMS. There about 30 students that day other than a group of concerned parents, teachers and the school's administrative board.

Ustaz Lizam gave a short briefing for the students, reminding them about their extra day in school, a new addition to their schedule while moms and dads had tea and some titbits with the guests. He also introduced the teachers and
administrative members of the school to the children. Later, the parents joined the assembly to hear speeches from Mr. Samad (the advisor), Mr. Halim (the principal) and the guests - Dr. Sarwar Jamil, The Manager of Community Languages Services and Mr. Draper, Swaythling Primary School's Headteacher.

(Pic 1: Registration table)

(Pic 2: Hear ye! Hear ye! Calling out names of students for class 1, aged 4-6)

(Pic 3: Getting the kids to line up properly is not as easy as it sounds :))

(Pic 4: Ustaz Lizam introducing us to the students)

After the short assembly, we went to the designated classrooms along with the children. Since there's an event organised by Malaysian Students' Association in the afternoon, we decided to end the class at 11.30am. I had to handle the kids aged 4-6 this week and it was a challenging one!

(Pic 5: From left; Dr. Jamil, Mr. Draper, Mr. Samad and the Principal)

(Pic 6: Do you think I'll leave my mommy on her first day at school, alone?!! That'll definitely be boring, people need babies for amusement! :D)

What did we do for the class last week? Till the next post says hi, ciao! :)

Why Holiday is Bad for bloggers?

2007-06-22T10:02:00.000-08:00

... unless they've prepared for one! :)

We had a nice weekend last week. Spending the whole Saturday morning at the commencement of the Southampton Malaysian School and enjoying fun activities, games and meeting friends at MSA's Family Day event later in the afternoon. Thank God there were a lot of yummy food at the end, I've been starving all morning, forgetting to take some breakfast before leaving home. On Sunday, we went to a farm (was it Pickwell?) to pick strawberries. Well, there's this eating while picking 'interruption' all the time as you are allowed to do so, so picking was not the only acitivity available there :D. But don't go picking and eating without buying any-lah. You'll make the farmers' blood go upstairs then :D

After enjoying the farm scenery and activity, we went for a picnic at a nearby park but it was sooooo windy and cold, we end up getting home catching a flu! And that troubled me all week as the kids were also uncomfortably unwell and fretful. It was nice to spend the holidays with people you love, doing things you like at places you've been dreaming of. But holiday means away from home, the pc and loads of work waiting when you return. Unless, you're all prepared because holidays could be awfully bad for bloggers, especially those who are planning to profit from it. Read Why Holiday is Bad for Bloggers at ahmadaffzan.com.

I miss my baby ...

2007-06-15T04:20:00.001-08:00

... and my baby misses me! ;)

We made a 2nd trip to the centre yesterday to submit my CRB form, again. Me, my husband and the little girl. We left the big boy at 'kakak-kakak's house (the Mayfield Rd. girls), being afraid that it might take some time there and dearest Handzalah will feel bored waiting. He was all happy going to 'kakak-kakak'. No doubt, they treat him everytime with a 1st class service. Driving all attention to him, only! ;)

It turned out that the submission and checks only took a few minutes so we drove back to the girls' house hardly half an hour after leaving from their doorstep. I went in to fetch Handzalah but he was all busy with the laptop. Mai said he has been watching Spongebob. Our laptop is a bit 'ill', it keep on shutting down everytime we play a movie or video, hence, Handzalah might have enjoyed his short stay having the technology all to himself to watch all his favourite entertainment programs! I tried to persuade him to come home with me but he seems not interested and Mai said I should leave him for the day since I'll be coming back to the area to visit a friend in the evening. I thought, no, he's going to miss me if I leave him too long. But then, he might need a lil bit time-out from home with his favourite 'kakak-kakak', so we went home without him.

At home we had lunch together and I gave Fidaa' her first introduction to solids! It's apple puree for the day. Well, as expected most of the puree came out than went in! ;) After lunch, Abuhandzalah was off to the office and I tried to finish my never-ending workload with the computer. Fidaa' was already sleeping after a long feed, and oddly, I felt so lonely! The world seems a bit 'wrong' having so much silence around. Oh my, I'm missing my baby! He drives me crazy all the time when he's nearby with his cheeky acts and witty stories. It's not like he's never been somewhere else but that's usually when I'm somewhere else too doing something that I can't include him with. Not when I'm working at home. Not like now. Oh my, I miss him! At this kind of moment, I always think of whether he misses me too?

Suddenly I heard a strange knock at the door.

Somebody's knocking the lower part of the door as if he/she is short. And the knock sounds a bit strange. It comes and goes as if someone's playing around with the door? Aiyah, could it be Handzalah? The phone is again, not working so the girls might have come without being able to tell me they are. So I simply asked who's out there , is it Mai? (one of the girls) and thank God she said yes hehe. My baby boy is back! Mai and Azila brought him to the park at the university to play football as he seemed a bit bored but later he 'brought' them home. This big boys know the way home ey? :) And he misses ummi. He wants to get home and eat 'nasi'. He wants to be home. With me. ME! I love you too sayang ...

* Do you like the graphics? Check them out at GranGran's Graphics.

First day at the centre

2007-06-13T10:02:00.000-08:00

On Monday we went to the Centre of Language Services to meet Dr. Jamil, Manager of the Community Language Services in Mount Pleasant Junior School, Southampton. We were there to register ourselves and hand in our CRB (crime record bureau) forms which I do need to re-submit because I didn't have enough proofs of address then! They should have at least stated clearly the requirements so that we'll know what to bring. Anyway, the technical stuff didn't take much time and fuss. The excitement came later when we sat with Dr. Jamil for what we thought was going to be a short meeting yet became a really long one.

We requested some teaching materials for the students and teachers from the centre, hence Dr. Jamil had to check the list before giving his approval and gave us a few useful tips on handling the tightly-budgeted resources. He also clarified about the training sessions that we'll undergo later this year InshaAllah. At the moment, as he stated, we are considered 'untrained' until we complete the teacher's training. One of us asked whether our MAs and PhDs will be put into consideration (most of us are tutors and lecturers studying for a further degree) and with a big smile he answered, "You can use those if you're teaching in the university but in this country if you're going to teach children you'll need a special training and those degrees do not count" (to be considered trained) hehehe. We had a great laugh at that. Well it's true. Teaching children and adults or even teens are different. They communicate differently, perceive differently and they are even naughty in really different senses huhuhu. I'm looking forward to join the training sessions as I've put my registration for the childcare courses on hold.

We brought back some materials from the centre. Coloured pencils and papers, scissors, tapes, exercise books, cards and so many other things. We even got a teacher's pack each. It feels like going back to kindergarten seeing all those things, only this time we're no longer those little cuties singing ABC hehehe.

I'm surprised to learn that the centre will be providing us with materials and help in preparing lessons. Well, that's why we've been registered under the centre. We can come to the centre for advice and preparation and use the facilities there. Doesn't that sounds nice?

Help me!

2007-06-11T00:18:00.000-08:00

A little bit of update - forgot to emphasize we're teaching MALAY LANGUAGE.
---------------------------
I'm glad I wrote about the new 'teaching' thing in my previous entry. Thanks to my dearest friends and family for being so supportive.

Sekolah Malaysia Southampton will begin it's journey InshaALlah on Saturday, 16th June 2007. There will be three classes for three different age groups and I'll be handling those aged 9-12 yrs old and 13-17 yrs old. For the first class this week, I'll be handling the little darlings aged 4-8 yrs old, only for registration and a short introduction. But there's a big task of preparing the syllabus and appropriate teaching materials for these little beings. Any ideas on what and how? If you have any interesting materials/suggestions on teaching kids this age (4-8yrs old), especially on Malay language and the basics of Islam and being a Muslim, please help me out. I would very much appreciate your kind advice and attention.

For your information, Sekolah Malaysia Southampton (Southampton Malaysian School) is managed by a group of parents and postgraduate students of the Malaysian community here. We'll surely need a lot of help to materialize it's mission and vision. So, let me hear your kind thoughts and please remember us in your prayers. May Allah help us all :)

I'm going back to school!

2007-06-08T20:00:00.002-08:00

Yup. I'm going back to school! Not to be taught yet to teach, surprise, surprise. That's a big surprise to myself! I've been thinking of enrolling in a childcare course this year, but I guess there's a bigger cause to serve InshaAllah, hence that dream will need a little more wait. I've always loved school, education and children. I've always wanted to be a part of an educational institution, a think-tank that'll be able to generate fresh ideas for the betterment of the society. The only thing I never thought I'll do, is "teaching" itself! Erm, though parenting is a bit of teaching, I'm still an amateur in it.

I was talking to my dearest sister, Lieawulf whom has been lecturing in a private college for quite sometime asking her for some helpful tips. She told me:"On your 1st day entering the class, show that you are kind to them but you can also choose to be fierce and roar in class hahaha...". Well, that's a message from a teacher handling college students. I'm going to handle younger children in primary and maybe secondary schools. I'm still unsure of what's ahead, as this will be my 1st experience ever though as Lieawulf noted that "we - the sevenlords - are all talented" in this profession and I should just go ahead and test my skills hahaha. Well, my mom, dad and elder sister have been personal tutors for people for a long long time now though I bet none of you, if you know Lieawulf the way I do; an introvert who hardly speaks to another stranger will be a teacher! And what do you know? She's even good at it! She has been an assistant to her Tae-kwan-do instructor for sometime, I have no doubt if she's teaching that, but imparting non-physical theoretical knowledge is something too hard too imagine! And one 'secret recipe' of the sevenlords, we seem a bit extra fierce most of the time, but deep down our humble hearts meant well and we're the type of "I'll do anything" for the people we love and of our concern such as our students (pendek kata garang tapi baik hati la tu ... kot? ;)).

For the past year, I've been teaching 14-16 lovely girls Tafsir; the translation and scholars' comentaries of the Qur'an and I really enjoyed doing so. I've just started coaching Lisa with the Arabic alphabets and I'm hoping I'll be able to accomplish my small mission with her before returning to Malaysia. I've always enjoyed conducting study circles on Islam (usrah) and I guess I do have one or two skills up my sleeves but I'll need a lot more to really teach properly, especially this time it's in a formal setting and I have a syllabus to follow and finish! Good thing we'll be sent for training. Alhamdulillah, thank you Allah and those out there whom have trusted me with this valuable opportunity. Not just for some pocket money, but for experience and knowledge I might not be able to get elsewhere, in other ways. I wonder if teaching 6-17 year old kids could be a done in a more relaxing atmosphere, putting more interpersonal and group communication skills into practice. After all, teaching is not speaking in public, a one way communication system. Right? If it is, it'll definitely be boring!

Any tips from teachers or tutors out there? Care to share them with me? Comment please :). At the moment, hoping for your prayers, God-willing InshaAllah, may everything goes well for the school and me.

For your information, Sekolah Malaysia Southampton will be in action soon InshaAllah. It will be held once a week, teaching Malay Language and Basics of Islamic Fundamentals (Fardhu 'Ain) for children of Malaysian families.

p/s: Handzalah and Fidaa' will have their abi to look after them when I'm teaching, Alhamdulillah.

nurinmz.com - downtime

2007-06-06T01:22:00.000-08:00

I'm sorry to announce that nurinmz.com is temporarily "closed". With extreme carelessness, I've left the computer to my little boy without signing out from my blog account first. Hence, my older posts and comments have been deleted. Thought I'll write something new afer a long rest, but ALlah Knows Best, sendiri cari pasal. I'll figure out how to get things back to normal later. At the moment I'm off to the island of Regrets.

Critical. Creative. Contemporary.

2007-06-01T22:38:00.000-08:00

I'm writing a new blog, dedicated to critical and creative thoughts upon current issues. Visit nurinmz.com and let me hear your thoughts about mine :) (using the comment field and rating technique). Jazakumullah Khairal Jazaa' + Thanks for your loyalty!

7 Things You Should NEVER Feed Your Family!

2007-05-30T01:01:00.000-08:00

Got this from Mak. And now I feel sinful! Please read through and you'll learn that some of the nicest things in the world could be dangerously deceiving. For the sake of your health and your loved ones, keep them off the dining table, lunchbox, picnic basket and most importantly your mouth folks! Err, since we're humans, you might want to start decreasing your intake and get ready to serve more healthy home cooked meals on the table.

By Jaclyn Johnson
eDiets.com Staff Writer
Updated: August 16, 2006

There will always be those fattening foods that are easy to make, easy to get, and easy to crave. You think “OK, I know this is bad but it can’t be that bad!” Think again. Here are the top seven foods you should never ever feed your family or yourself!
1. Doughnuts

It’s hard to resist the smell of a Krispy Kreme doughnut, which is why I never step foot in the store. Doughnuts are fried chock-full of sugar and white flour and loads of trans fat.

According to the Krispy Kreme website, an average 3.5 ounce sugar doughnut weighs in with about 400 calories and contains few other nutrients besides fat. These sugary treats may satisfy your craving but it won’t satisfy your hunger as most of the calories come from fat.

"Eating a lot of refined sugar contributes to blood sugar ‘swings’ or extreme fluctuations,” eDiets Chief Nutritionist Susan Burke said.
- have I ever told you that I LOOOOOOVE doughnuts?

2. Cheeseburger with fries

The age-old classic may be delicious but think twice before sinking your teeth into that Big Mac. The saturated fat found in cheese burgers has been linked to heart attacks, strokes and some types of cancer.

“In fact, fast-food portions are gargantuan, almost double the calories per meal compared to 20 years ago," Susan says. "Twenty years ago the average fast-food cheeseburger had about 300 calories. Today’s BK Whopper with cheese has 720. To burn the excess 420 calories, you’d have to run for 40 minutes. For example, in 1985 a medium French fry had 240 calories, 2.4 ounces. Today’s ‘medium’ is 6.9 ounces and 610 calories.

"This fast-food meal of cheeseburger and fries has way too many calories and fat grams, not to mention grams of saturated fat, trans fat and cholesterol and sodium.”

Let’s break down this meal. First, take the white-flour bun (refined carbohydrates), then add some processed cheese (saturated fat and trans fat, plus lots of additives and preservatives) and then top off with fried red meat (cholesterol and saturated fats). And let’s not forget about the condiments such as the always fattening mayonnaise.

Not sounding so appetizing anymore, huh? Oh, and let’s not forget about the infamous side dish. You cheeseburger will most likely come with a side of French fries, which is sadly the most popular vegetable dish in the U.S. Don’t kid yourself, French fries are not vegetables, they are extremely high in fat and contain a tiny amount of nutrients.

3. Fried Chicken and Chicken Nuggets

With the recent class-action lawsuit between The Center for Science in the Public Interest (CSPI) and KFC, the health risks posed by fried foods are becoming more public. The CSPI is suing the food chain for their use of cooking oil containing unhealthy trans fats. The lawsuit seeks to order KFC to use other types of cooking oils and to inform customers how much trans fats KFC’s food contains.

Foods cooked in highly heated oils (most notably partially hydrogenated oil) have been known to cause cancer, weight gain and other serious health risks if ingested regularly. A 10-piece chicken McNugget from McDonald’s has 420 calories, 24 grams of fat and 1120 milligrams of sodium. One Extra Crispy Chicken Breast from KFC has around 420 calories and eight grams of saturated fat. So unless you want to super size yourself, it’s best to make a clean break with fried foods.

- no 3 & no 4 are our favorite take away/delivery menus. Thank God we rarely eat out!

4. Oscar Mayer's Lunchables

Sure they are convenient and easy, but boy are they unhealthy! These kid-marketed lunches are loaded with saturated fat and sodium. They usually contain highly processed meats and cheeses, white flour crackers and sugary treats. Lunchables get two-thirds of their calories from fat and sugar. And they provide lopsided nutrition since they contain no fruits or vegetables.

“They insidiously promote obesity by making kids think that lunch normally comes in a cellophane-wrapped box," Susan says. "Parents are promoting their children’s obesity by buying these items. They’re expensive, too. Pack a sandwich and save dollars and health.”
- huh? Never bought any.

5. Sugary Cereal

Not all cereals are created equally. And while your kids might beg for the latest cookie or marshmallow chocolate surprise cereals, it is a safe bet they are about as healthy as a dessert. Keywords to look out for are puffed, dyed and sweetened.

Most kids’ cereals are so highly processed they no longer look like the grains they were originally made from. A healthy alternative is oatmeal. Although, if you are buying pre-packaged oatmeal make sure to check the label and see how much sugar it contains, you might be surprised.

"A little sugar isn’t a problem but when the first ingredient on the box is sugar, then watch out," she said. "There is no fruit in Froot Loops. But the unsweetened original Cheerios or Rice Krispies are fine, and you can sweeten them naturally with blueberries and strawberries.”

- guess what's my husband and son favourite breakfast cereal?

6. Processed Meats.

What falls under the category of processed meats? Hot dogs, sausage, jerky, bacon, certain lunch meats and meats used in canned soup products. Almost all processed meats have sodium nitrite added as a preservative.

A recent study conducted at the University of Hawaii found that sodium nitrite can act as “a precursor to highly carcinogenic nitrosamines -- potent cancer-causing chemicals that accelerate the formation and growth of cancer cells throughout the body.” So eliminate these meats from your diet before they eliminate you!

- Hmmp. I don't stock up the fridge with any of those.

7. Canned soup.

Sometimes regarded as a healthy food, soups can be very deceiving. You must stay on your guard because many canned soups have high levels of trans fats, sodium and artificial preservatives such as MSG. Just one serving (which is roughly one cup) can have almost 1,000 milligrams of salt. Also, steer clear of soups that are cream-based, they can be high in calories and fat.

Susan says it is important to “read labels from back to front. Ignore the health claims, and instead focus on the ingredients and serving size. Watch out for hydrogenated fat (trans fat) and sodium. If you’re buying bread to go with you soup, the first ingredient should be whole grain -- either whole wheat, rye or other grain. If it just says ‘wheat bread,’ that doesn’t mean whole wheat.”
- what?!

'Make Your Own PlayDough' Recipe

2007-05-26T23:40:00.001-08:00

a kg of flour
half cup of oil
10 tsp. of salt
coloured water

* I divided the mixture into different portions to put in different colours. You'll need to adjust the amount of water for a good, non-sticking dough. Try it at home with your kids and enjoy!

Credits to Ako and Bengkel Asuh Bijak JIM.

talk-about-babies [part 6]

2007-05-26T22:42:00.001-08:00

It has been so long since t-a-b appears. Ummi has been busy writing other things ey? And maybe there's just too much to tell about my two lovely babies. I'm going to tell their story anyway, for my dearest family and friends.

For a start, let me tell you that I've been deprived of a good night sleep for more than 3 days now. I'm sleeping during the day, when the kids are finally asleep. That's about 3am-5am for the little girl and the latest 7am for the big boy. No, Fidaa' is not colicky and no, none of them are sick. It's just that somehow, for uncertain reasons I can't recall, handzalah is reluctant to go to bed at his usual 'late' sleeping time at about 11pm to 1am daily. And, Fidaa' happens to love his company that she has joined the late night party! Thanks to these little heroes, ummi has turned into a batwoman - with transformation incomplete though, am not going to wear the batsuit of course! ;)

Handzalah:

is about to be 27months old on June 1st. He's babbling and blabbering around copying everything that gets to his ears so beware! Don't talk nonsense when you're with kids. Funny that docs say they have short-term memory when they remembers all the bad things :D. He plays football with abi nearly everyday and still love listening and dancing to the beat of the music. Any music will do but he loves songs with children's voices the most. He's even singing nowadays and he makes my heart melt!
Tried teaching him the Arabic/Qur'anic alphabets with the Iqra' Opah sent us but he seems not very interested in anything but the last page. Can't expect too much from kids, they enjoy activity - that's active and interesting. Someone sent us a link to a Youtube video with kids singing the alphabets an dit was so funny. Handzalah loves it and he's been watching the Muslims kids' school series from Youtube since and Alhamdulillah now he knows a few of the alphabets already.
We've just made ourselves a nice kilo of 'PlayDough' recently in red, yellow and green. This vege-lover boy will ask ummi to make him a 'broccoli' using the green dough other than 'nasi' (rice). Jazakillah Ako for the PlayDough recipe. She got it from Bengkel Asuh Bijak and it works well alhamdulillah. Will share it with you later inshaAllah :)
He has his own trainer seat now for the potty. He can tell us when he needs to go, pull off his own pants and uses the toilet for the poo-poo whenever he 'has the time' or remembers. Ummi does try asking him if he needs to use it at the usual times of the day to help make the potty-training a success but he's yet to be able to tell us if he needs a wee. I did put the potty-training tips into practice to help him with it and one of them is by making him familiar with the toilet and the trainer seat, placing it on the toilet's lid everytime we take him for a wash in the bath and 'offering' him to use it.
He calls himself his name "Handzayah" now. At last, he got it 99.9% right praise be to Allah :)
There's one time Ummi felt unhappy and cried for sensible reasons and took the trouble to 'report' to Abi that "Ummi sedih" (Ummi is sad). Hehe, never let he sees you doing anything negative kay? Kantoi nanti! :)
He lovessssss his sister though sometimes jealousy precedes and he doesn't know the limits. He's always the first to check things out hearing his sister cries. You should listen to him trying to calm her crying sister saying, "Fidaa' jangan 'ngis, abang ada ni" (Don't cry Fidaa', big brother is here). He's even very kind towards other 'babies'. Always offering a cuddle and 'looking after' role as if he's bigger and older.
I'm not sure if he's an introvert as he's usually okay with adults but with kids his age, he has a certain 'time out' kinda thing. He'll play with them but he'll have a period where he'll do something else or find someone else - the adults I mean.
His appetite has tremendously increased. Well, he needs all the energy to get him moving. He's the Jumping Bean - that's what our Health Visitor, Anne calls him because he's always jumping.
If you love your techno-gadgets and the memories within, keep it 'far' from this little boy. He knows how to dig things only by seeing you click them once.
His skin is greatly improving (he has eczema, if I've not mentioned it before). We've been prescribed with DoubleBase and it has done a good job keeping his skin moisturised for a longer period of time. Lesser complaints and better night sleep (if he sleeps ;))

Fidaa':

is now 4 1/2 months old. She smiles and laughs and she has just started rolling. Her first successful attempt was yesterday when she was crying, asking her Ummi to pick her up while Ummi was busy in the kitchen. She was lying on her stomach then and I guess she can't wait any longer to get on her back.
she loves interacting with people. She'll be making so much sound when you talk to her with cute expressions making you feel eeeeeeee geraaam! ;) She's very alert and strong according to the GP and the docs-to-be; my fellow Tafsir class students. Sarah even did a physical test ton confirm Azila's non-scientific yet observant assessment.
she's still on breastmilk, fully and I don't think I'll start weaning until she's 6 months old if she doesn't show any signs of need before that.
I think she's teething. She dribbles a lot, struggling to suck her thumbs and sometimes seem a bit unhappy though she has just finished a feed.
Alhamdulillah up to this moment she doesn't have any problems with the skin except for the normal nappy rash that goes on and off.

We went to the Commons last weekend, all four of us! We used to take turns pushing Handzalah's pram or walk and chase him around but now we're both occupied with both lovely beings on their prams and Handzalah on his feet!

This is the funny alif baa taa clip from Youtube. Enjoy!

love IS BLIND.

2007-05-22T21:10:00.000-08:00

Missing my friends. My dearest friends. For no particular reason except for a heart that still feels in a soul that's still breathing. I miss them!

---
Love is blind.
You forgive,
you forget
for love
no matter how deep is the cut.

You saw those black spots
imperfection,
the dark side
airing negative thoughts.
But love is blind,
letting them remain unnoticed
perceiving only beauty and kindness
with all your heart.

Love is blind.
No wonder there's never a mountain too high
or a jungle too wild,
no view could deceive
what a heart perceives
as love, perfection.
Devotion.
The sense of being complete.

But love, believes in eternity
where happines lies and freedom lives
hence, lovers fly to the skies
without wings, yet a heart fully determined.
And what's with those glittering wonders,
temporal splendours
when the world shall only means darkness to the eyes
of those who believe.

I wish to love and see Thee,
to walk through this destiny
in blindness of hardship and sufferings
leaving pain and bad memories remain unnoticed.

Love is blind.
Thank God, it is!

khaleel el-wafy
644am, 23/5/07
S'oton.

Library Opening

2007-05-17T10:45:00.000-08:00

message from Hanan:

Salamo Aleikom everyone
We are glad to invite you to the grand opening of 
Southampton Medina mosque trust limited Library.
Please forward the eflyer to everyone you know
in Southampton and please try to come.

Jazakom Allaho Khayran

---

* Saturday 26 May:
10:30am to 1:00pm - girls' session (girls and women ONLY)
1:15pm to 4:30pm - boys' session (boys and men ONLY)

* Sunday 27 May:
10:30am to 4:30am - Children's session (girls of all ages, boys up to age 10 ONLY)

Everyone's invited! Try to be there inshaAllah :)

Books

2007-05-17T10:36:00.000-08:00

Parenting Skills Based on the Qur'an and Sunnah : With Practical Examples for Various Ages

128 Pages
by Dr. Ekram Beshir; Dr. Mohamed Rida Beshir

Description:
The Beshirs, a wife/husband team, who co-authored two best-selling books on parenting Meeting the Challenge of Parenting in the West, an Islamic Perspective and Muslim Teens and Blissful Marriage: A Practical Islamic Guide have conducted very successful workshops on parenting skills for Muslim families in North America and overseas. In this book they present the workable skills that parents participating in these workshops have found most rewarding. "Very professional, well researched, and pretty lively. Where were you 16 years ago? I wish I could start all over with the knowledge I gained from your workshop." An attendee from South Africa. "It was a very joyful experience. I learned so much more than I ever expected. An amazing and thought provoking workshop." An attendee from Toronto, Canada. Dr. Ekram is a medical doctor by profession, with a background in child psychology. She is the founder and principal of Abraar full time Islamic school and Rahma School, a weekend Arabic and Islamic school, in Ottawa, Canada. She is the recipient of the Director's Citation Award of the Ottawa-Carleton District School Board for the year 2000 for her contributions in the area of education from among 7000 employees in the board. She has been very active with the Muslim community in Ottawa in the areas of study circles, children and youth camps, sisters programs, and marriage counseling. She has traveled extensively to various parts of the world to present parenting workshops. She has also authored other books for teaching Arabic to Muslim children living in Non- Arabic speaking countries. Dr. Mohamed Rida Beshir is an engineer by profession, with over 25 years of experience in Da'wa work in North America. He has held various positions with MSA and ISNA on both local and national levels. He is a member of the training and development department of the Muslim American Society (MAS). He is a regular speaker in ISNA, ICNA, MSA and MAS conventions. He is actively developing and delivering training programs to various Muslim communities all over the world. He is the recipient of The Ottawa Muslim Association and the Ottawa Muslim Community Circle recognition awards for years 1993 and 1999 for his volunteer Islamic work.

source : Bazar, Islamicity

half-hearted; to Him we shall return

2007-05-15T05:01:00.000-08:00

News: Ayong, our beloved aunt (more like a loving granny to me) has left all of us yesterday ... Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi raji'un. From Him we came, to Him we shall return.

Knowing her for three years, I look forward to every journey to my husband's hometown of Muar, simply to see her and and her big, funny cooking experts family. I guess her daughters inherited all her kitchen skills mashaALlah. She'll always greet us with a loving smile and cuddle, even mentioning 'sayangnya' everytime we arrive at her humble 'kampung' home. She was a great cook although retired from the kitchen in her old age, and her children seems to keep the good cooking tradition among them. My husband will be mentioning her delicious cooking whenever the family serves us great home cooked food at the kitchen table. Even now when we're far from home, everytime we talk about Malaysia and it's delicacies, he'll come out with something nice, home-made by Ayong and her family. One of the best would be her 'sambal', which is a must during festives like 'Eid with a special touch that makes it taste so nice you'll hardly find an equal.

One great thing I'll always remember about her, was her caring attitude towards others. In these few years, she hasn't been able to see properly due to her serious diabetic problem. I don't even know whether she had ever recognize my face but her caring heart has never seems to fail 'seeing' and feeling the people around her. Everytime we're in her company, at her home especially, she'll be asking her childen whether they've served us food and drinks and whether we've eaten properly. She'll be so concern that she'll be asking the same question a few times. She'll even sit next to us, just to 'look' at and honour her guests. A life devoted to serving her beloved flesh and blood, and the community around her, I pray that Allah will grant her peace and blessings during her short rest in al-Barzakh till the eternal Aakhirah inshaAllah.

I'm feeling half-hearted now, thinking about my dearest family at home, so far away from reach. But life, needs to go on and the mission, although with a lot of struggle, needs to be accomplished InshaAllah. I pray, and I pray, and hoping for your prayers, that this little mission will be accomplished in time and we'll be back home soon InshaAllah. Isn't it a tradition of travellers, parting from friends and families,? Lillah, fillah InshaAllah ... terimalah ya Allah.

To those whom sent us their heartiest condolence and joined the funeral prayer (ghaib) last night, may Allah reward your kindness - Jazakumullah Khayral Jazaa'. Every soul shall have a taste of death (Quran - 3:185), have we been preparing ourselves for it?

Ayong, we'll miss you...

Virginia Tech and Anizah Othman, the world we're living in

2007-05-12T04:12:00.000-08:00

I could not recall knowing Ustazah Anizah during my campus years although we were in the same university (and she's about my age). But my heartiest condolence goes to her family and friends. In a noble quest of educating the society, in a remote area where most young teachers and government officers would like to avoid, this tragedy would be another dark memory not only for those related to the victim but for all of us. When such stories became public through the news, the world - where's sanity and senses live - has never failed to respond with utmost concern and sympathy.

When the 23-year old student of Virginia Tech gunned down 32 of his fellow mates and staffs what did he have in mind? What would possibly trigger such rage ending with the boy shooting himself? I wonder. The moment the news of the killings reached his parents, family and friends what do they think about? Did sadness and questions overwhelmed them and made the thoughts unknown and unjustified? I wonder. And I wonder how those related to the victims feel when such precious lives can't be brought back though the world's empathy didn't fail to declare their sympathy.

And again, as a parent I wonder how worried one could be of their offsprings and loved ones when the world has been composing such horrifying histories. Both Anizah and Virginia Tech had different stories and background but shared the same feelings and concerns from the public. I can't imagine a father sending her teenage child to school in the morning only to comprehend the fact that later in the afternoon he or she had been murdered by a deviant colleague who has been present and around all the while. It won't be easy for a mother to accept the reality that her beloved child has been killed on the way to her friend's house when she's been expecting a ritual call, assuring everything's fine and well. You observe your child daily and you loved them ever since you knew they exist only to believe that they left you forever in the most impossible manner that you could think of. I pray that Allah shall give us patience and strength in enduring the loss of our loved ones, always.

Discussing such issues, I'm wondering about the future of our children and generation. What will it be? Young people are indulged in deadly, massive killings. Weapons are being traded on the streets. Policemen 'permitting' a public institution to continue its activities when a killer is walking throughout its amenities. An educated woman being strangled to death with reasons and exact account of the tragedy remains a mystery. People crossing the boundaries of sanity and humanity.

The public might forget these stories in a month or two unless another hit the news wal'iyazubillah. But should we, parents and people who claimed empathy towards the good of the community stay in the state of negligence and forgetfulness of our duty to help the society heal, to promote healthy ideas and means in handling such issues that triggered loads of data and analysis from experts and authorities. What could we do, should we do?

Think! Because it starts from you!

In Malaysia or Virginia, we feel.
Let's think and let's act, let us all heal!

Allahumma ... guide us and protect us from such calamity.

Coconut Delight

2007-05-09T09:41:00.000-08:00

I’ve been trying on some recipes these few weeks, as if i’ve got nothing to do ;). From the previously successful ‘kuih ketayap’ to the challenging currypuff ;), I even ventured into making ‘cendol’ which erm has ye to reach a happy ending. Isk, I did that for my anniversary using all ‘means’ and it end up in the dustbin! Allahumma yassir. Nevertheless, I knew what went wrong if I’m about to try it again.

Been ‘thinking’ of Coconut Candy (Candy Kelapa) lately. I remembered having them most of the time in the fridge - made by Mama herself but she can’t recall the recipe now it has been so long since she last made them. Anyway, when I was making ‘inti kelapa’ for ‘kuih ketayap’ last time, I noticed a recipe at the back of East End’s Desiccated Coconut pack - Coconut Delight. I thought it’ll be great to try, even if it won’t equal the Malay Coconut Candy, I should at least feel delighted by its taste … well, the name says so ey?

The trial was successful and I should say it tastes just like coconut candy but the texture is a bit soft and moist. There’s a ‘missing’ taste an dI don’t know what. For now, this is the recipe copied from the pack. Help yourselves folks!

COCONUT DELIGHT

200ml/7 fl oz milk

50g/2 oz East End margarine

375g/13 0z sugar

350g/12 oz East End Desiccated Coconut

1 teaspoon ground East End Green Cardamoms

Lightly grease a medium size shalow baking pan or sheet. In a large saucepan, bring the milk and margarine to the boil over a medium heat. Stir in the sugar, desiccated coconut and cardamom, stirring constantly for 6-8 minutes until the coconut becomes thick and glazed. Remove from the heat and pour into the baking pan. Cool, cut into squares and serve.

* I didn’t use all East End’s products except for the desiccated coconut. In fact, I used butter instead of margarine and exchange ground cardamoms with vanilla essence because I simply know abuhandzalah and the little boy won’t like it. Any other ideas?

dua mimpi

2007-05-05T15:54:00.000-08:00

Kelmarin aku bermimpi
suria bersinar cemerlang
di lorong sunyi ini,
burung-burung menyanyikan lagu riang
dan bayu lembut berbisik;
bahagia telah datang,
bahagia sudah menjelang.

Tetapi semalam,
mimpi indah jadi ngeri;
langit memuntahkan petir
dan awan gemawan hitam
dikejar pekik angin
ribut dan kabut,
lorong sunyi jadi gelap
hujungnya jalan mati.

Apakah?
Aku tak mengerti.
Keliru makin bingung,
benarkah hujan panas
bisa menemukan pelangi?

Tinggal harap pada Kau yang sudi.
Dengarkan,
jangan tinggal aku sendiri.
Leraikan,
usah yakinku berbelah bagi.
Tuhan,
biar kutahu erti isyarat-Mu
dan hati ...
ittaqi, ittaqi!

khaleel el-wafy
0024am 060507, rumah kecil Furzedown Road

Today

2007-05-02T00:28:00.000-08:00

Time really flies, and life has changed so much, but alhamdulillah for everything, I'm always smiling. Fidaa' wakes up with a smile, Handzalah wakes up with a cry. But ummi and abi will laugh at both entertainers who start our days with joy. It's three years together now and I'm all grateful for everything I have and do not.

Alhamdulillah for this ni'mah, alhamdulillah for this love. The journey is still far and there's a lot to learn too.
A lot to improve and bitter moments to chew. But may Allah give us courage, wisdom and strength for we only love because of You. Never feel weak or unimportant, never grieve for our shortcomings for there's space for lessons and improvement. Never say never to the challenges ahead as I'm always here with you, for you. To walk those challenging steps, through times good and bad. Just don't look back until we reach His hubb! Uhibbukfillah. Salam ulangtahun dan terima kasih,
pada semua, untuk segala-galanya.

that day in January 2007 ...

2007-05-02T00:16:00.000-08:00

I receive a note from beloved father. And how I wish, I could hug him and tell him
"I LOVE YOU FOREVER!"

This is Papa. I glanced at the photo of my grandson. How I feel to be with him in times of need. Eyes of marbles and lips with amplified meanings, looking with anxieties......my goodness tears on my cheeks, remembering those good old days taking him for a stroll to far away places. Complacent in his buggy unaware of the journey, whether it is cold, hot or windy. Soccer is his favourite and he knows where and when to get started. He is a left footer and dribles like a six footer. When the day gets dark it is time to get back. Once again he is in the driver's seat. Home we go through the Commons and the uncommon, sometimes breaking the speed limit of FURZEDOWN ROAD and passing the NO ENTRY ROAD. Passerbyes with curiosity will have all the smiles, looking at this cutie already in his dreams of the far away places and his Chaffeur of Minangkabau origin. Alhamdulillah, home at last, waiting with garlands of curry aroma are his Opaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah and Umi. Unfortunately.... he is still in his dreams .

To Nurin Mazaya, we are proud of you as a wife and mother. Keep it up. We love you and HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

18th January 2007

bismillah ...

2007-04-16T07:01:00.000-08:00

alhamdulillah, all praise be to Allah who sent us the Book as guidance and the reason of success in this world and the hereafter.

dearest friends, thank you for stopping by for a read. the so called writer has been "out of reach" for a while due to a dead phone line and a laptop falling ill recently.

alhamdulillah everything's normal again. and with the new member in the family, there's so many stories to be told and so many precious ni'mah to ponder upon, the writer will be posting new entries soon InshaAllah. thank you for your patience and loyalty :) - here's a little gift for everyone - Fidaa', our little sweetheart born on 15th January 2007.

please make du'a for everyone, may Allah forgive us and grant us patience and peace to live and understand His blessings ...

p/s: credit to hana for the nice pics and memories in bath :)

tetamu nan teristimewa!

2007-01-11T19:55:00.000-08:00

I've been waiting to write this entry, but, thinking that having a pic with it will be absolutely better than just words to describe has resulted the delay. 'Ala kulli haal, can't wait, no more ... I don't want to forget and I don't want to procrastinate, not only the little time I have left but also the precious memories that I've had!

Did I tell you (my dear friends), I've had a few special guests last year? My 6th sibling, Ijlal a.k.a UI came just before the beginning of winter, and later on my beloved parents and youngest bro Zak during the summer ... they were like angels sent to lift up my spirit, offering a helping hand. All three of us were delighted with their stay, Alhamdulillah and MashaALlah. We haven't left Malaysia that long yet are blessed with the chance to go home when Abah was terribly sick and having family around before and after our journey back home to look after Abah whom was hospitalised for more than a month ...

But that was at the end of 2005 till 2006. This year began with another blessing. My favourite mu'allim, a very close family friend and our all time murabbi was invited for a winter program by a Malaysian groups of students here in the UK. I was informed about his coming by KakLong, but I can't seem to find a way to get his contact number even until the very day he came. I even asked my family back home to contact him in advance so that i can see him when he arrives, but ALlah Knows Best it was just not meant to be. A friend reminded me about a schoolmate somewhere here in the UK, telling me that he might be seeing him. I was relieved and quickly sent an SMS telling him to at least send him my Salam and invitation to our little home in S'oton.

Sadly, the text message didn't receive a reply until one day KakLong's lil sister in Dublin told me that he was in S'oton and will be travelling around the South! Again, quickly, tried asking some students if they know that he's around but I was too late. The moment my questions were answered he has already left S'oton and I don't think I'll get to see him, ever!

Frustrated. I can't even remember the last time I met him. He didn't even had the chance to attend our walimah for reasons unavoidable and I've never seen him since then. I have so many questions to ask and most of all, I just need to see him!

I keep telling myself that it's ok, tak ada rezeki and I've tried. But Allah Knows how happy I was knowing he's here and how it turned into negative feelings not having the chance to at last (I thought) meet him with my new little family, husband and son. Allah, Allah, Allah.

But ALlah Most Gracious listens how, and knows why and He granted my wish when I least expect it!

Talking to my mother near New Year's eve, I told her that I didn't get to talk to him nor meet him and I think he's back in Malaysia already.

Later that week, at last, an SMS from my dear schoolmate came asking my contact number for another junior of mine. I thought it was just another Alumni thingy but I was so surprised, soon after my husband replied the message a call came in and seconds after I was talking to Mu'allim Muhaimin! Subhanallah, my heart was jumping and ... err whatever that's applicable :) - he said he's coming to visit me tomorrow if it's okay with us. OF COURSE! (Nah, cemburu tak kalian?!)

And on the morning of Thursday, 4th January 2007, we had our first special guest/visitor from home that didn't only remind me of home but the place and the people I've known for so long ... the people I call friends and teachers, the place I really felt like "home" and the memories I've always treasured all my life ...
* may Allah bless him for his kindness towards me and family. Cikgu pula yang cari dan ziarah anak murid! :D

Mu'allim Muhaimin was not only a teacher and none of my mua'llims nor mu'allimats were ... they are murabbis, they aren't my parents but they are people so dear and close to my heart for what they've instilled in my soul for more than a decade. Hira' was also no mere memory to me, it was a blessing of a lifetime! I am what I am, partly because of them and partly because of my family (other than my current life-educating processes and experiences). The place that reminds me of Allah and the beauty of Islam in both, ideals and practice. We had an Islamic bi'ah/environment I've yet to re-discover anywhere. It wasn't perfect but enough to teach me and enlighten me with a mission and vision that guides my lifetime journey.

One thing about Mu'allim Muhaimin himself; in Hira' we were taught to give salam especially to teachers whenever we pass by anyone of them, but this mu'allim of mine has always challenged us the other way round ... he'll be the one giving salam first when we are struggling to find the chance to greet him before he does! :) Teringat beria-ia sengaja kami tunggu dekat koridor kelas yang dua tiga meter je dari bilik Mu'allimun sebelum Mu'allim lalu, macam main aci, nak cuba beri salam dulu! I'm not sure whether we've ever "won" that game though ;).

That's why these people are special. They have great knowledge yet a very humble character. They treated us like children, or at least someone close to them, not just like a student -I don't know whom- but I just have to teach- till they pass in class like many no-teaching-passion teachers are nowadays :(.

I remembered the day I was asked whether I want to go to Hira' (for primary) or another school, I simply said Hira', not knowing why but I believed it was His plans for me. I enjoyed 9 official years there as a student and "child" along with my female siblings. I'm not sure what they think or feel about it now, but I'll say I have no regrets being part of the system though we had to learn in harsh conditions and hardly being recognized by government institutions nor anywhere else. Whenever I'm there it feels like, "I don't wanna grow up I'm a Hira' kid" :) (quote:Toys R Us).

I left Hira' with a heavy heart, always finding a way to get back. Alhamdulillah, we manage to establish an Alumni where I did get a chance to work for and enjoy reunions with the people I've always cherished and loved.

Hira' is still very much alive and expanding. It has been growing since those sweet old days with new branches in Jeram and Shah Alam. We have a big family of Hira'ians now. I'm not sure if my teachers could still remember me but I remembered the last time I called Jeram's office to enquire about something when I was in the university, the staff requested my name and I said I was a student but I don't think you'll know me. Citing my name, he quickly told the others it's me and I heard somebody said; "Siapa tak kenal "me"?!". Huhu, nasib baik tak balas, "Encik bergurau ke ni?". 'Ala kulli haal, that's what I call "home" err other than these "homes" of mine-lah of course!

Friends? They were too many to mention. Of various batches and ages. We're still in touch though many of us are already parents to children and even figures in our own fields and paths. Alhamdulillah. These are the people that need no ice breaking when they meet. They might be separated for years but their hearts are like flowers in the spring, blooming with glory whenever the sun touches them with its soft light, flourishing the earth in the slightly cosy breeze. Err ... I'm waiting for the moment to meet them again, SOON, hopefully inshaALlah :)

Well, I do miss those days, NOT to say that I'm not happy with what I have now, Alhamdulillah I am blessed with a great companion and a lovely child, MashaAllah. Just like the blessings of being a part of the Sevenlords. I just hope one day I can share this bliss and happiness of mine with my friends, as I would love to share my fond memories of yesterday with others with my little family now.

Sometimes, you just want to be "where everybody knows your name ..." :) . (quote : Cheers).

Jazakumullah khairal jazaa' ... ;)

... and yearning for another beautiful history tommorrow :)

catatan hari ini

2007-01-08T22:01:00.000-08:00

1
Meski diungkap kalau beribu
fatamorgana tetap hanya
harap nan palsu.

2
Hari ini dan masa depan
mustahil jadi putusan
dadu yang dibaling tangan.

3
Yang bisa mengertikan hidup ini
dengan peka minda dan suci hati
akan ingin mempelajari,
tak pantas angkuh dengan
sijil-sijil rasmi pengiktirafan duniawi.

4
Ibu tua yang tidak bisa menggenggam pena,
tidak mengerti falsafah dan politik dunia
mungkin punya anak graduan PhD.

5
Kulit anjal yang penuh berkedut
membalut susuk yang tak lagi pejal
dan bukan lagi jaguh,
mungkin saksi sebuah sketsa hayat
nan panjang,
penuh makna dan harap bertaut.

6
Buah yang masak ranum
pernah muda, kelat dan keras
sebelum harum manis isinya
menjenguk halkum.

7
Yang celik mata tetapi buta hati,
hanya akan dapat melihat jalan-jalan
dan persimpangan
tanpa mengenal arah dan destinasi.

8
Hanya iman yang memandu nilai serta budi
bekal hakiki paling relevan lagi mesti
dalam meniti jalan mencari Ilahi.

khaleel el-wafy,
rumah kecil furzedown road, 9 Januari 2007.

Orang putih ke Melayu?

2007-01-08T21:23:00.000-08:00

I'm still here, blogging in the early dark hours of the day ... The little fella has yet to make an appearance. Well, there's still 9 days to go before its due :)

Why do I blog in English?

Malay is my mother tongue though I've finished a degree with subjects mostly in Arabic and the rest in English. I love to write poems in Malay, though I do have some pieces in English and maybe one? in Arabic (its not that good though).

Indeed, I am better in Malay when it comes to expressing my thoughts and feelings in those poetic notes. Erm, puitis sangatkah? Tidak. I don't think I'm much of a poet. I've too little writings in comparison to the other poetic artists or even friends and even lieawulf! ;) I would consider my writings as notes on life and observations, unnecessarily poetic, but usually in poem-form ... sort of!

Aduh! Saya sedikit hairan bila al-akh Zaid Akhtar mengajukan pertanyaan kenapa saya berbahasa Inggeris di blog dan ke manakah puisi-puisi Melayu saya? Saya masih menulis dengan bahasa ibunda, berpuisi (mungkin) dengan bahasa yang pertama saya kenali di dunia nyata. Puisi-puisi saya juga masih memenuhi blog usang ini. But I do blog in English (I do write in Malay occassionally) for a few reasons:

- I need to practice the language, especially after graduating from the university ... well, language is a bit BIODEGRADABLE ;) you might lose it by time without practicing (its even very rusty already) ... I am currently living in an English speaking world, but I don't have the chance to mingle much to effectively practice it outside so the least I SHOULD BE DOING is this? :)

- I have many non-Malay, non-Malaysians friends. I want them to be able to understand my writings, like my dearest brother luqmanlee ... he used to visit my old blog to leave messages without having the chance to understand my musings. Isn't that a disadvantage for da'wah? (if the content is relevant).

- I believe many of my Malay speaking friends whom are internet-savvy are also multingual, bilingual: Malay+English at least! But some of my English speaking friends know very little Malay or none at all! Hence, let's do justice to everyone :)

I'm communicating with my son in Malay though I do read and teach him in English. I'm hoping that when it's time to go back home, my son will be able to speak both Malay and English well.

I can't help it. He's a Malay just like we are. So are his grandparents. I don't want him to come home like some Malay-tetapi Orang putih? children that do not even speak a single Malay word nor understand it!

I know, many people are proud to have fluent English speaking children (even if they are totally ignorant about their own language and culture), but I have to say that I'm not going to be proud to have a child instilled ONLY with values and a worldview adopted by the West. We are what we are. This is my view though. I know that sometimes people regard me as a weirdo for not being too excited living and bringing up a family in this Mat Saleh/Orang putih's country.

I'm a Muslim, and I hope to bring up a child with Islamic values and worldview, and that will be a priority. If he speaks English well, alhamdulillah, as we should benefit that from our stay here. But please Handzalah, learn Malay well (and InshaALlah Arabic too), as there's nothing wrong about being one!

Erm, there are studies suggesting that children might be confused and refuse to communicate when there's too many languages used at home. But the findings are not definite (well as far as I've read :)). Some suggest that one parent should use only one language. I do agree. But I also think Muslims are born to be at least bilingual because all of us speaks Arabic! ;) hehe in our prayers 5 times a day at least!

ALlah Knows Best! :)

buat Syaffa ...

2007-01-08T21:14:00.000-08:00

nukilan ini buat Syaffa, my dearest cyberfriend that I haven't met but has become a dearest sister of mine ... sayang sekali berkali-kali cuba hantar pada Syaffa tapi tak berjaya. ALlah Knows Best :). Jazakumullah Khairal Jazaa' untuk kiriman dari bumi eire, moga dalam lindungan rahmatNya sentiasa!

------------------------------------------

buat Syaffa

Du'a ini buat sahabat
moga sentiasa dalam
rahmat tenang dan berkat.

Terima kasih untuk kiriman dari jauh.

Sepenuh hati aku merafa' syukur
akan ni'mat Tuhan
nan sentiasa meneduh,
kala hati dibasahi hujan sendu
kala jiwa dipanah terik mentari rindu,
bukan hanya pada abi dan ummi yang jauh
bahkan buat teman-teman
yang semusim lalu
bersama mengharung dingin tengkujuh
bahana air bah,
dari kawah dakwat
pena-pena nan jahil dan angkuh.

Titipan mereka memukul arus keliru,
menghenyak dunia yang kerdil
dihanyutkan buntu,
dunia yang sugul
makin kelam, makin kabut,
tapi kita bersatu
dan atas nama-Nya
perjuangan ini bersahut!

dan kita,
dengan dua tangan yang lemah ini,
hanya bersandar pada hati
yang teguh dan ampuh,
memohon lindungan redha hidayah,
hai musuh ALlah,
dengan mata pena ini kau kurusuh!

Pejuang ALlah tidak takut mati,
meski yang sekerdil kita ini
hanya pantas 'syahid'
dari jendela maya
dan akhbar-akhbar kontemporari.

Hari ini sahabat,
karyamu ku dakap erat
jadi semangat,
perjuangan ini tentunya penuh lelah dan penat!
Namun bukan untuk seorang aku,
kerna yang seperti engkau disitu
masih beribu-ribu di seluruh pelusuk
kerajaan Tuhanku!

Dengan nama Tuhan Yang Esa
kutuliskan bait-bait kasih,
cinta dan rindu,
moga dunia masih bisa tahu,
ni'mat Tuhan indah nian
buat yang celik dan sanggup
mengharung jalan pulang pada Yang Satu.

kuhimpunkan realiti-realiti masa,
kusandarkan pada kalimah al-Haq
dalam 'amrain' yang diwariskan baginda,
kubongkarkan makar dan tipudaya mereka,
moga dunia beroleh beza
melihat nyata
biarlah al-batil bertemu seteru yang setara!

sahabatku kalam ini untukmu,
moga qalam di tanganmu
tak pernah kering
dari bimbingan hidayah-Nya selalu!

"[Yusuf:108] Katakanlah (wahai Muhammad): "Inilah jalanku dan orang-orang yang menurutku, menyeru manusia umumnya kepada agama Allah dengan berdasarkan keterangan dan bukti yang jelas nyata. Dan aku menegaskan: Maha suci Allah (dari segala iktiqad dan perbuatan syirik); dan bukanlah aku dari golongan yang mempersekutukan Allah dengan sesuatu yang lain."

qul hazihi sabili ... salam kasih ukhuwwah dari yang jauh:
khaleel el-wafy,
rumah kecil furzedown road, s'oton,
0325am/nov 17,2006

sleepless nights ...

2006-12-31T18:54:00.000-08:00

Salam 'eid mubarak to all. Hoping everyone had a pleasant 'eid at home or anywhere you are fi hifzillah. We celebrated 'eid in S'oton last Saturday and seems like it was merrier than 'eidul fitr, as told by the others. There were even more Malays attending the 'eid prayer and there was 'makan-makan' as usual at Kg. Broadlands. Seems like everyone's back from the winter holidays. And people back home in Malaysia celebrate it today with Qurbans and a wedding soon InshaALlah. Kak Diana is already married to a Kelantanese guy and they'll be having a reception at the groom's hometown on the 2nd day of the New Year InshaAllah. Barakallah lakuma wa feekuma wa jama'a bainakuma fil khayr. That's a very merry 'eid isn't it? :)

But, the three of us celebrated 'eid "quietly" at home, all because of the false alarm! ;)

We slept really late on the night of 'eid after cooking some raya delicacies when I started to experience discomfort and pain. MashaAllah, We thought the little fella was about to 'come and celebrate' 'eid with us three. But he/she didn't turn up. Nope. Not yet. It was just another 'drill' I guess. We stayed home all day and life goes on with a lesser 'eid feeling. Too restless and tired. Nobody had enough sleep. And too excited in a way, not knowing what's up next.

Nevertheless, we had three visitors in the evening. Lucky them and us too Alhamdulillah, there's food to be served and enjoyed by everyone. Not to forget the special 'pink' ketayap/kuih dadar with white coconut filling : well, we didn't plan to make any and there were no green colouring nor brown sugar to make it look the way it should. It was our first trial which was a success, hamdanlillah! :) Taste matters, right? It's abuhandzalah's favourite and I'm happy that at last, I can prepare it from my own kitchen! Err, of course with abuhandzalah's skillful technique of spreading the dough (men'dadar'kan bancuhan kuih) in the pan, as I'm a bit 'tak gheti guano' to make it nicely round and thin. Huhu, just like the way we made English pancakes. I'll get all the ingredients ready mixed and he'll do the rest. He's even better at handling the really really thin popiah skins the first time we made our own too. Aiya, I need more training with my hands-lah ;)

Poor Handzalah who hasn't been anywhere much lately. The weather hasn't been good for walks in the park and ummi hasn't been that well for long journeys. He had so much fun after my last visit to health center last week, when we stayed at the uni's park for a while to let him run around and watch the ducks enjoying the cold flowing water in the pond! One of those flying creatures flew on top of our heads and Handzalah was really stunned! He was laughing and mentioning "duck", "duck" all the time. He likes it so much whenever we walk down to the university (and up home) especially during these holidays when there's not many people around; dunia ini aku yang punya! He'll be running around without anything to worry about. We usually let him free on his feet which usually capture's the public's eye with all smiles and sometimes "HI". Well, he's that friendly little guy that passes a bit spark to everyone, the person you'd like to run into during the gloomy days with dark skies. :) There's one time he walked pass an old man and he told us with a loud voice and a big smile, "The little man is marching" ... aha, he is! "Marching" ahead with all positive thought in his head and heart, I think, and I do believe. Isn't it nice to be like a kid, with the least to worry about and the most to be happy of?

Lately, Handzalah has learnt not only to give cuddles and kisses upon requests but he's offering and requesting them from us! Usually before he falls asleep or if he's up before bedtime ends and he needs to sleep back, he'll call for ummi and abi, saying "pewuk" (peluk/hug) or "shium" (cium/kiss) with his two hands and cheek ready for action. I'm thinking of the moment I'll need to leave him with his favourite 'kakak-kakak', that's when we'll be in labour ward! Will he be fine? May ALlah ease everything and make him happy always. I hope we won't need to be in the hospital that long. Though, I know he's always excited and will have so much fun with them around. He'll always fall asleep in the car after we left their place because he'll be all busy entertained and entertaining! He'll be playing here and there, this and that, calling their names and forget ummi's there too ;). We just gave 'kakak-kakak' a raya visit before maghrib today and we stayed until 9pm! Simply fulfilling his everyday request - wanting to see them! :) Hoping to keep him occupied and happy having another little fella around. Thinking of a proper timetable to get him to the library and playgroups when I'm all well InshaALlah. I don't think the little playtime and learn we're having at home now is adequate for his development. Well we do mix around with other families and children, but as he's growing I just hope I can cope and do enough things (if not more) for his growth.

Sleepless nights ... I think it's very much usual for new families to have them or everytime there's a newborn. Or in some cases, married life requires you to stay awake for a lot of reasons and most of them - to care for the people you care most about! Well, during pregnancy it's quite a normal syndrome, where mothers-to-be experience sleepless night and restless mornings. Sometimes you just can't sleep and most of the time the discomfort deprives you from a good one. That's part and parcel of motherhood, and parenthood too. Mothers and fathers will be 'zombies' for nights and weeks before they adapt to their new roles and responsibilities. But it's not something that starts or ends during early babyhood, those sleepless restless days might recur whenever any of your beloved ones - especially the little helpless fellas - fall sick or had trouble sleeping. We had that problem with our little boy before. He slept well during the first two weeks but we still had to wake up for changing and feeds and nurse him in the hospital when he had jaundice in the 2nd week. It continued non-stop through weeks and months as he was colicky and later on developed a problem of adjusting his sleep in the proper hours at night. My husband had to buy us lunch everyday because we never had the chance to sleep well at night and therefore in the morning, I'm all tired and exhausted. He'll be going to work with a tired sleepy face. Only until he's weaned off the breastmilk totally that the sleeping problem really went away but alhamdulillah it was better after hist first birthday. I would say the colic had an effect on his sleep and so did our journeys and travelling. I remembered reading and listening to the Health Visitor's/GP's saying that he'll never be able to settle until we settle down - from moving - FIRST! So to all parents wannabe, plan well please :). I know it's not easy, we've had changes in our original plan due to things happening beyond our ability to discard them and therefore THE CONSEQUENCES!

Nevertheless, I hope our countless, sleepless, restless nights will be accounted for as good deeds that will be rewarded with pleasure in the eyes of the Almighty ... Ihfadzillaha yahfadzka!

salam 'eid mubarak to all and forgive us for our weaknesses and wrongdoings.

* read about colic

tiga perkara

2006-12-27T20:09:00.000-08:00

yang tidak ada di kamar kita
bukan jendela,
kipas angin
atau pendingin hawa berkuasa kuda

yang tidak ada di rumah kita
adalah isteri dan anak-anak
(juga barangkali suami,)
yang menjadi penyejuk mata
sumber ketenangan jiwa

yang tidak kita punya
rupa-rupanya kasih dan cinta
sedingin air telaga,
tenang dan bersahaja
namun sentiasa segar
menghilang panas tubuh,
letih dan dahaga

bahang yang terasa
di sebalik istana mewah terbina
kerana kita
tidak kenal Pencipta,
tidak kasih kekasih-Nya,
dangkal dalam mengertikan
kalam-Nya nan sempurna

kenali dan cinta
tiga perkara
moga hilang panas di dunia
bersama bayang nyala murka
neraka Tuhan yang setia menanti
bahan bakarnya

khaleel el-wafy
rumah kecil furzedown road,
Dec 28, 2006.

talk-about-babies [part 5]

2006-12-06T18:17:00.000-08:00

the little boy has grown ...

so much!

Sometimes, I just can't believe my eyes and ears: the way he acts and talks it's like he's left the tiny, cuddle-only babyhood for a long time! Now he's learning to call people's names, especially kakak-kakak's: the frequent visitors to our little house.

He has so many expressions now: laughter, smiles, frowning and even cries like he never did before! He's a bit too dramatic sometimes, pulling his little face to show ummi and abi "I'm sad"! That's usually when ummi gives him a "time-out": out of the sight when he did something really wrong, e.g stay in the kitchen or outside the bedroom - just like the "naughty step" thing in parenting OR ummi leaves him with his intolerable behaviour, no more games, no more talking and ummi will go to bed. We'll get him after some time, ask him to give a handshake or actually salam, a hug and a kiss to say sorry. He usually stops crying immediately and we'll pick him up with a hug and kiss in return... the funny thing IS, if he's out of the door, he'll come knocking and crying but still says "Akum" - assalamu'alaikum in his language asking us to open it ... oh, anak ummi! cepat cair hati ummi macam ni :(.

I don't believe that hurting him with too many loud and harsh words will help, and just forget about spanking! Though these days, I think I've been a bit too emotional - I'm in my last stage of pregnancy - I felt so bad having to feel angry when he does things wrongly. May Allah grant me patience to cope, poor fella, he's just a kid that's learning to know the world ...

He's usually funny and really loves joining others' conversation, especially when people burst into laughter, he'll cry "hahaha" though he doesn't understand why. He knows how to make a fake "crying" sound now, just for fun ... and he loves babies so much, he'll tell you there's a baby in sight whenever he came across one, in books, the tele or those he met at home and outside. He's always calling "adik",patting his hands on the tummy and sometimes lovingly leaning his cheek and head on it with a kiss "muahsss..."! Some people say that's his best and special skill: hugs with a long "muah" kissing sound ;)

He's copying, immitating nearly everything! He's good at house chores or shall I say better these days as he has developed such "interest" far earlier. He'll help ummi to sort clothes and load the washing machine. He'll also help to take out the clothes and get them hanged, and spin the inner part of the machine (like ummi always does) before closing the door to make sure every single thing has come out :). Whenever he finds something on the floor that shouldn't be there or if something dropped, he'll say "Allah" and pick it up. He's very kind and keen at helping out anytime; unless he has something more interesting to do :). He'll get things for you whenever you asked for them or whenever you mentioned so. He even tried helping ummi up/out of the bed when ummi's backache troubles her to do so :). And now he knows to complete the prayer, he can do ruku', sujud and the sittings between, pointing out the finger for tahiyyah and also the ending salams; though he might not do everything in every solat of his! ;)

He's good with technology! Give him a computer, a PDA ... anything? He'll delete some files, turned on some music and even get his voice recorded in them! :D He's so observant and he's absorbing everything, just like a sponge! As you know, he loves music and lately whenever abi and ummi sing along (or talk to others sometimes), he'll give that "silence, please" sign - finger on lips - with a shhh! ;)

His always observant and absorbing sponge-like mind has given so many surprises. He might not copy things or pronounce words immediately after you teach him, but he'll popped them out later when you least expect it! Just like a few nights ago when he mentioned "kakak Aziya" (for Azila) a few times before bed! He knows and remembers where you keep things and what's missing from a puzzle or the shape sorter.

He has discovered what's beyond his diapers and he's showing some readiness for potty training. He knows how to tell you when he'll poo but rarely mention if he needs a wee. Watch out if he's squatting undressed (usually after a good wash)! The last time ummi and abi didn't pay attention to that, he left some "gifts" in front of the bathroom and on the bed! Erk ... He'll try to put on/off his own clothes, and brush his own teeth but he doesn't really like brushing them much. He's about to complete his first sets of teeth soon inshaAllah.

He loves to read! He wakes up and goes to sleep with books; err and some biscuits and water too! Is it ok to let him have snacks before bedtime? Now he can read Postman Pat's Big Book of Words showing the blender, kettle, washing machine, toaster etc. whenever you mention them ... he knows the black cat from Hansel and Grettel and the teapot from Beauty and the Beast ... I'm trying to find him a new set of Sirah/Islamic animated book so that he can learn from them as well. Have just taught him alif, ba and ta. He'll reach the whiteboard, pointing the letter "ba" and pronouncing it everytime we sit in the lounge; ummi's teaching area :). Seems like "ba" is more popular than the other two eh?

Is there a child in the UK that knows nothing about Bob the Builder? Even Joode is a big fan of him! That's my lil nephew in Malaysia. We don't have Sky at home but since we bought him a pair of wellies with Bob on them, and a big activity book with Bob and team, plus kakak-kakak showing Bob's series on YouTube, he has turn into another fan, no doubt! He'll ask for Bob - that's the book or the newly bought (by kak Mai) 15-piece Jigsaw puzzle. I think kids just love Bob on his big machines, just like Handzalah love his Dig, Dig, Digging book that's filled with diggers, tractors and rubbish trucks.

Hmm ... in a month plus-time, this little boy will have a baby bro/sis (surprise, surprise!). I don't know how it's going to be then, but I hope Allah we'll ease this journey of parenthood with granting us guidance, knowledge, strentgh and patience to produce little mujahids and caliphs (the wonderful term from bigSis' friend) ...

last but not least: ... and this loving son of mine, knows whenever I feel a bit down. Well he loves giving away cuddles and kisses all the time, but he'll give a long big hug and kiss ... whenever I don't feel fine. Trying to make ummi cry eh? ;) my little heartthrob!

* read about a 21-months old's growth here

I am an Idealist?

2006-12-04T19:33:00.000-08:00

hmm ... haven't taken any personality tests for so long, kinda miss them! :)

anyway, dropped by at lieawulf's blog and found her doing this 3Qs Personality Test,
very short yet interesting because I think it is quite true ... in some ways, in certain aspects ...
maybe, and maybe not ;) ... what do you think ... of ME?
hmm, 'ala kulli haal I do think its good to know our own personality especially through certified/authentic tests because they'll help us to know ourselves, through attitudes, strength and weaknesses and let us develop into a better person inshaAllah ... and in this challenging field of da'wah and quest of 'ubudiyyah, knowing oneself might ease the path to reach and touch the hearts of people and to know God ... Allah Knows Best! :)

Your Personality Is

Idealist (NF)

You are a passionate, caring, and unique person.
You are good at expressing yourself and sharing your ideals.

You are the most compassionate of all types and connect with others easily.
Your heart tends to rule you. You can't make decisions without considering feelings.

You seek out other empathetic people to befriend.
Truth and authenticity matters in your friendships.

In love, you give everything you have to relationships. You fall in love easily.

At work, you crave personal expression and meaning in your career.

With others, you communicate well. You can spend all night talking with someone.

As far as your looks go, you've likely taken the time to develop your own personal style.

On weekends, you like to be with others. Charity work is also a favorite pastime of yours.

The Three Question Personality Test

dedikasi buat dua insan teristimewa

2006-11-25T01:02:00.000-08:00

tanpa ayah, tanpa ibu

gimana aku menjadi aku?
tanpa ayah, tanpa ibu
gimana kenal cinta dan rindu?
tanpa ayah, tanpa ibu
dunia pasti keliru dan buntu
kerna kasih sayang tanpa syarat
hanya bisa datang dari
yang melahirkan dan membesarkan
tanpa pernah mengungkit penat
tiada pernah mengaku jemu
sentiasa rela, sentiasa mampu
membela dan melayani
setiap satu kerenah dan perilaku!
untuk Mama dan Papa,
terima kasih seluruh jiwaku
moga akhirnya di firdaus al-a'la
hidup dalam pandangan rahmat-Mu selalu!

kew, nov25, '06 - rumah kecil furzedown road.

Alhamdulillah, thank you ALlah for my mother!

2006-11-24T23:54:00.000-08:00

note:
It was Mama's birthday on Nov 23rd. I don't have enough words to express my thoughts and feelings about her. I could only hope that Allah shall accept and answer her prayers and mine, and that she'll be blessed and rewarded with every kindness fiddarayn - in the world and the hereafter. This article is dedicated to my beautiful mother, who devoted her life being more than just a mother, and to all mothers especially those who spend their time fully at home for their family and children, regardless of the qualification and ambitions they have, ignoring criticism and the 'popular' perception of the world that undermines them. May Allah bless! (Don't forget to pray for your parents, they deserve more than just that!)

(Luqman:14.) And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command), "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.

(al-Ahqaf:15.) We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents: In pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth. The carrying of the (child) to his weaning is (a period of) thirty months. At length, when he reaches the age of full strength and attains forty years, he says, "O my Lord! Grant me that I may be grateful for Thy favour which Thou has bestowed upon me, and upon both my parents, and that I may work righteousness such as Thou mayest approve; and be gracious to me in my issue. Truly have I turned to Thee and truly do I bow (to Thee) in Islam."

The Value of Motherhood in Islam

by: Fatima Barkatulla - student and mother of sons, aged three and nine months

*ftm: full-timemothers

A man once came to the Prophet Muhammad and asked him "Oh Messenger of God, who amongst the people is the most deserving of my good company?" The Prophet replied "Your mother." The man then asked who came next and the Prophet said again "Your mother." The man yet again asked who came after, and the Prophet yet again replied, "Your mother." The man asked "Then who else?" Then the Prophet said "Your father."

In this way the Prophet made clear to the Muslims that the position of the mother and the honour and esteem in which she is held is paramount and that she is the most deserving of our good treatment and companionship.

In the Qur'an too we see that after devotion to God, parents are the most deserving of our good behaviour and the role of the mother is specifically recognised and praised. When parents reach old age, they are included in the family and should not be neglected and lonely, just as they looked after us when we were helpless children. In this way the cycle of mutual care between parents and children is sustained.

I myself have felt valued and admired as an ftm in the Muslim community, indeed it's something Muslims respect greatly in a woman, but being born and brought up in the UK, I often felt that full-time-motherhood was not only undervalued but barely mentioned as a dignified and desirable option in the Girls' School I went to. I think the reason that people look at motherhood in such different ways boils down to how they view the roles of men and women in general.

In Islam, women and men are equal in the sight of God, but they are different and consequently have different roles to play…both roles are as important as each other and they complement each other. This is the only way a harmonious society can exist: when men are men and women are women; when we embrace our femininity and our nature and stop fighting against it, yearning to be something we are not.

Muslim women have the right to be fully supported because the responsibility for maintenance is fully on the shoulders of the men. In fact when a Muslim woman gets married, she is given a marriage gift as part of her nuptial contract and is given all the required provisions for her welfare and protection. Any wealth she owns or earns personally is her own and is entirely at her disposal and she doesn't have to contribute to the family funds unless she wants to. When my own husband was made redundant a couple of years ago, I was not expected to go out to work and even when funds were low, we budgeted and were patient with the situation until things got better. In fact if things had gotten really bad, other men from our relatives would have helped out. Being an ftm takes precedence and is seen as essential by both of us, as well as our families.

If a mother wants to work or pursue any useful occupations, she may, after mutual consultation between husband and wife. (I myself am studying at home for my degree through an open-college course). But this is if her sacred role as wife and mother is not neglected. Her role as a mother is seen as indispensable to society because the family is a microcosm of society and without her, the future generation would lack the healthy moral conscience that is needed for the success and stability of the individual and the community at large. Children have a right over us and deserve our attention and care.

Apart from the fact that I love my children and love being with them and guiding and teaching them, I hope that God will reward me in this life and the next for being a devoted mother…and this is the Muslim belief - that every good thing a mother teaches her child, every bit of love and compassion she shows them and every sacrifice she makes for them will be rewarded by God, and her reward will increase and increase if her child passes on what she has taught and will keep increasing as long as the effects of what she instilled in him last in generations to come! What a wonderful image! The effect of what we mothers do is like a pebble falling into a lake and causing a great ripple that influences generations after us!

As for education, then Islam sees educating women as absolutely vital! As an Arab Poet says:

The Mother is a School
If you prepare her properly,
You will prepare an entire people of good character.
The Mother is the first Teacher,
The most important of them,
And the best of them.

Need I say more?

rindu mode: I miss the sevenlords!

2006-11-19T18:52:00.000-08:00

we had great fun together
with too many laughters
and loads of tears,
growing up with the best
mom and dad ever,
life has always been for a great goal
to attain His pleasure.

not with dreams too big
but pursuits and ambitions
that let us mature,
didn't they raised us like stars?
never too far to be remembered
always loved and cherished
by each other.

remember the songs and dzikr
we sang in our journeys far and near,
remember the jokes and gossips
we shared in our rides to school
and the university together,
remember those fight we had
over the house chores
and who gets to do lesser,
remember those eat-out-time-out
breakaways and plannings to celebrate
special days for everyone, every year,
remember how we've always been
defensive of mom and dad
and how we've always stood by each other,
remember those conflicts and issues
that we've faced and brought us closer,
remember and remember those days,
those times,
never let them fade
from your memories forever ...

we had great times together before
and may we have them again and always
in the hereafter!

khaleel el-wafy,
Nov 20, 2006
furzedown road, s'oton

Three Tips to Strengthen Your Family

2006-11-16T19:52:00.000-08:00

By Khurram Murad.

To deepen the love and to improve communication between members of your family - spouse, children, parents - your should aim to establish the following three activities in your home.

Firstly, perform some of your daily Salat collectively with your family. Prophet Mohammed said that, 'When you have finished your [Fard] Prayer in the mosque, you should offer the rest of your Prayer at home for God will bless your home because of your prayer.' (Muslim)

Secondly, establish an usra or family circle to study the Quran with your family. The Quran alludes to reading of the Quran in families and in home in the following verse:

And remember that which is recited in your houses of the Revelations of God and the Wisdom. [al-Ahzab 33: 34]

You should aim to hold these sessions at least twice weekly, if not more regularly. Remember that the first recipients of the message of the Quran were the members of the prophet Mohammed's household. They were the one he paid most attention to in the early phase of his mission in Makka. So, you also must ensure that you spend adequate 'quality' time in educating and training your family.

Thirdly, develop the habit of having meals with your family. This will also provide a golden opportunity to interact with everyone, discuss family matters and reflect upon issues of the day.

[compiled from "In the Early Hours" by Khurram Murad, pp. 116-117]

memoir tiga tarikh dalam November

2006-11-16T15:06:00.000-08:00

Mama,
Abang, Nawwar & Ijlal ...

Selamat Hari LAHIR!

Know that we're thinking of you now,
with much hope and love
cherishing our moments together yesterday,
praying hard for another memory of US tomorrow ...

may ALlah bless you with His forgiveness and pleasure,
guide you in peace and happiness in every step till the hereafter ...

Loving you always,
Rin, Affzan & Handzalah

andai kau masih tak mengerti ...

2006-11-10T16:19:00.000-08:00

bila kan kau sedari
masa tak akan menanti
samada dia atau kau sendiri
masing-masing tak mengetahui
entah bila nanti
diseru kembali
nah, masa itulah
kau bakal tercari-cari
apa jawabnya pada
pendirianmu kini ...

kemenangankah?
atau sekadar ego yang kau rai?!

tak siapa hidup selamanya
sedarlah!
meski kau benar
tak perlu meninggi diri
hatta langit masih engkau junjungi
gimana cepat benar kau lupakan
bumbung yang meneduh
dari terik mentari?

dua orang tua akan selalu sabar
dan meyakini
janji Tuhan itu pasti
dan kebaikan buatmu selamanya
hingga ke negeri abadi
memaafkan meski engkau membenci

haruskah sangka-sangka bertitik hitam itu
terus engkau bajai
haruskah terus kau semai subur di dalam hati
mestikah mereka tetap menanti
engkau kembali
menghulur kasih
andai maaf hanya milikmu yang hakiki?

kalau engkau masih punya hati
dan mindamu masih segar berfungsi
ingatlah tiap titik susu ibu
yang mengalir deras memperkasa tubuhmu
ingatkah dua tangan ayah
yang sedia menyambut
tika engkau baru bertatih
melangkah satu, satu
ingatlah dua orang tua itu
yang tak bisa selamanya menunggu
untuk engkau sedari siapa dirimu

meski syurga bukan lagi di telapak kaki ibu
mestikah sebuah ikatan menghancurkan
simpulan yang selama ini mengikatmu
dan engkau berpaut padanya sepenuh jiwamu ?

aku hanya bisa berkata
dan kata-kata hanya akan tinggal
sebagai kata ...
andai kau masih tak mahu
andai kau masih tak tahu
mengarah tapak kakimu
ke teratak itu yang selama ini membesarkanmu ...
andai kau masih tak malu
mengatakan "aku", "aku"
dan menafikan dua orang tuamu ...
hanya tinggal doa mengharapkan
Tuhan, bukalah matamu!

khaleel el-wafy
Nov 11, 2006

selamat hari raya :)

2006-10-23T14:15:00.000-08:00

* 'eid sa'eed mubarak

** taqabbalallahu minna wa minkum

*** maaf zahir batin

- lukluk, abuhandzalah + handzalah :) -

handzalah's favourite ;)

2006-10-19T04:53:00.000-08:00

I Look I See - YUSUF ISLAM & FRIENDS

little Qari, qurratu 'aini :)

Promo ...

2006-10-05T23:00:00.000-08:00

congratulations to my dearest friends whom have set up their businesses online and offline :) subhanallah, how time really does fly high and fast! I can't forget the days we were together at school, thinking and acting like half-matured babies ;) or when we often chat through the YM during the days in the university ... and now, we're parents, businessmen, lawyers, engineers and mashaALlah so many other wonderful things we might not think of during those times :)

I would like to take this chance to promote a few sites belonging to my friend's, still new in the field and in the maket ... if you're a person who loves to help Muslim's economy and Muslim entrepreneurs, feel free to access these pages and have alook at their products :)

Nadie Sakura E-Shop
- various products and services, Malaysian-based, in Malay

Amal Wafa'
- long sleeve tshirts specially made for Muslimahs whom always on the go, Malaysian based, in Malay
- UK residents can place their orders through me

Behawitz
- a member or lelong.com (ala ebay Msia), Malaysian based, in English

fastabiqul khairaat!

busy busy ramadan al kareem!

2006-10-05T22:59:00.000-08:00

I can't remember how many times we've had iftar outside and @ home ... thanks to so many good Muslims around and the new students ;) (since they are the reason why most people are hosting iftar for others), I think this time around, Ramadan has really been busy! Busy for bonding, silaturrahm and ukhuwwah acitivities subhanallah ... guess everyone is trying to have their bit done during - it's like racing for khair - and for His pleasure inshaALlah :).

Thinking of the time spent having to be here and there (and of course the other 'waajib' outings for groceries, library, hospital n bla bla bla) there's like so little time spent for other wonderful things in Ramadan - the Qur'an, the sunnah prayers, Qiyam a-lail, dzikr etc. Well, not having the time is one thing, the energy 'left' to do those things when the time is there is also another question ... Not that I would complain about accepting invitations and attending them - as I do realise that it is also a part of a Muslim's duty towards his/her felllow Muslim brothers and sisters ...

Abu Huraira reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: Six are the rights of a Muslim over another Muslim. It was said to him: Allah's Messenger, what are these? Thereupon he said: When you meet him, offer him greetings;when he invites you to a feast accept it. when he seeks your council give him, and when he sneezes and says: "All praise is due to Allah," you say Yarhamuk Allah (may Allah show mercy to you); and when he fails ill visit him; and when he dies follow his bier.

(SahihMuslim)

Strive, strive, strive!

Ramadan has already entered the 2nd phase and that means there's no time left to fool around and sigh! Do not indulge yourself in wishful thinking, just wake up and do those things you need to do ... time and tide waits for NO man ...

dearest self and friends, don't forget to make du'a for all our brothers and sisters out there, at home and everywhere, lets seek His Mercy and strength, and may He reward us with the glorious taqwa and victory against the Kuffar and their allies ... alllahummansur islama wal muslimeen fi anha il-'alam!

don't forget the little sunnahs this ramadan - have a late sahur (well it won't be called sahur eating just before bed) but an early iftar ...

Anas (Allah be pleased with him) reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: Take meal a little before dawn, for there is a blessing in taking meal at that time.
(Sahih Muslim)

'Amr b. al-'As reported Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: The difference between our fasting and that of the people of the Book is eating shortly before dawn.
(Sahih Muslim)

Sahl b. Sa'd (Allah be pleased with him) repotted Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying:
The people will continue to prosper as long as they hasten the breaking of the fast.

(Sahih Muslim)

to those in S'oton Uni, ISOC's free iftar is available (still, mashaALlah ;)) @ Stoneham, Mon-Sat and watch out for interesting talks and speakers on their Saturday events (held @ the same venue) ... InshaALlah this week we'll have brother Abdul Rahim Green (I'm not sure what he'll be talking about but I'll guarantee that it'll be wonderful and beneficial! See you there inshaALlah :)

2:148. To each is a goal to which Allah turns him; then strive together (as in a race) Towards all that is good. Wheresoever ye are, Allah will bring you Together. For Allah Hath power over all things.

* ahadith from the book of Salam and Fasting, Sahih Muslim.

because I promise you ...

2006-09-27T22:46:00.000-08:00

there are times 'sayang',
when ummi won't be able to be there for you,
to talk or play with you,
to wipe your tears
nor end your fears ...

there might be times
ummi just won't be able to be here for you,
not that I don't want to, though I hope I'll always be able to ...
this is the truth, it hurts to admit, but simply true,
though my heart will always long for you,
and forever always I shall love you ...

because ummi is just like 'little' you,
needy and dependent in a lot of ways too,
I might fell sick or there's just other chores to do,
though always and always,
I'll try to give my best to you,
and for you ...

love is, little sweetheart,
mostly felt by the heart,
not always seen, heard or touched ...
know that my love will always remain in your memory,
though my cuddles and kisses are absent
from your senses to perceive ...

but don't worry little darling,
as I promise you,
Allah ar-Rahman ar-Raheem will
always be there for you,
He doesn't need any sleep,
nor will He be too busy for you,
He'll never fell ill,
or forget to care for you ...

He exists and lives forever too,
He's always watchful of everything you do,
to keep you safe and healthy too,
He's the best to rely on,
won't ever let you down,
so don't worry little sweetheart,
because I promise you,
He'll keep you company though the world stays busy,
He'll cure your sickness and makes you feel happy,
He even understands you better than me,
He'll help you go through the days,
with or without me ...

Handzalah 'sayang' don't you ever worry,
ALlah al-Wadud is indeed the best company!

ummi sayang kamu,
khaleel el-wafy
5 ramadan 1427H/27 sept 06

Google Adsense ... why?

2006-09-27T13:11:00.000-08:00

assalamu'alaikum friends,

you might have noticed the google ads and search tool newly added on the blog and you might be thinking why?

1stly, I would like to optimize my blog's usage - turning it into a beneficial search engine and research tool for myself, just like why I've put on the Qur'an phonetical searchbox on the left-hand side.

2ndly, Google Adsense program helps you to find targeted ads, or relevant to your subject/discussion/category and stop other no nonsense clicks from coming in. Well, having ads is a choice in blogger.com, and I choose to have them because it is helpful in a lot of ways.

3rdly, everyone who visits this blog can click on 'em and enjoy the same benefits. To those who own a blog might find it helpful to switched them on to.

4th, blogs or sites can monetized from this program through non-fraud ad clicks ;) ... as for me, for the meantime it is just a helpful tool ... I don't thin I'll ever get any profit from this ... huhu ... can you? YES, some people does but that might only apply to very popular blogs with consistent updates and useful informative contents ... and erm, me? I'm too far behind ...

so to anyone who thinks those ads or search tool are helpful, you're welcome to benefit from them too ... otherwise, you need not to help by clicking what's not 'clicking' your views ;) ...

dunia ini fana',
lukluk :)

cermin safar. ini ...

2006-09-26T07:36:00.000-08:00

semalam,
aku tiba di daerah ini
dengan hati yang faqir
dan faham yang kerdil

dan semalam,
aku tiba dalam silang hangat siang
juga dinginnya angin malam
lewat persinggahan musim luruh
mengirim gemilang semusim bahang pulang

hati dan mindaku luas terbuka
belum ada yang menghinggapi keduanya
perjalanan ini masih terlalu muda!

ada sedikit duka tersisip di hujung hati
mengingatkan yang ditinggalkan
untuk hadir ke mari
namun hati masih besar dengan syukur
kerana musafir ini
seribu pengorbanan
seribu erti
bukan jauh jarak berenak-enak santai bercuti
bukan untuk melarikan diri
amanah yang udah lama terpundak
hanya kian memberat ...
gimana bisa dilupai?

dan hari ini,
meski sudah ribuan konklusi
jua persepsi yang datang dan pergi
perjalanan masih belum tamat
malah masih banyak berbaki
permusafiran ini yang udah terasa penatnya
baru saja menghadiahkan senyum gembira
untuk aku syukuri sentiasa

jalan ini yang aku pilih
takdir yang dianugerahkanNya
sedang membuahkan kemanisan
yang belum aku temui taranya
benarlah kata-kata
"Erti Hidup pada Memberi"
meski aku tak punya
lebih dari sekeping hati dan dua tangan ini
untuk memohon rahmatNya
barakah dan petunjuk sentiasa

aku masih mencariNya ...
di daerah ini,
di mana-mana aku berada
hidup ...
usah penuh keluh
dan 'dzan' yang seburuk-buruknya
Dia lebih baik dari kebaikan
yang mampu engkau fikirkannya
dan aku yang sepertimu hanya mampu
terus melangkah
menghadap rintang berliku
mengelak onak dan duri
mengejar cita dalam sempitnya waktu

namun susah pasti ada senangnya,
dan liku-liku kan dilalui dengan kelapangan jiwa
meski sabar dan tawadhu' tak bisa memadam cerca
dan mata-mata serong yang berlidah nista
hanya dunia yang menipu
namun Dia tetap benar dengan janjiNya

dan demi Dia yang bersumpah dengan masa
aku tinggalkanmu dan kecintaanmu kepada dunia
hanya sedikit ini bekalanku moga-moga,
kuntum du'a masih mengharap hidayah Yang Esa
Tuhan jangan tinggal aku sendiri,
walau sekerdip mata atau yang lebih pendek darinya ...

selimutilah aku dengan Taqwa padaMu
agar aku tak keliru dan panjang asaku
moga sisa masa masih ada buatku
menemukan redhaMu dalam nafas akhir fanaku ...

*terimalah ya ALlah!

khaleel el-wafy
4 ramadan 1427H/26 Sept 2006

talk-about-babies [part 4]

2006-09-22T23:47:00.000-08:00

For those who has been wondering what Handzalah's up to right now - erm he's still in deep sleep :) (its 8 a.m). He's very active - day and night - running and jumping around, he'll say "jump, jump" everytime he plays the jump-jump game :). He calls out ummi (out loud ;)) whenever he needs anything or fell down, he can say "abi" clearly but he's been calling abi the same way he calls ummi lately (I don't know why :D) and his favorite words are "ALlah", "ummi" (truly, he'll be saying ummi again and again though he doesnt needs me), "ayam" (he likes chicken?), "plum", and he can pronounce names like "Amir" and "Mayam" - thats Maryam :). Says "nak" when he wants something, "air" when he needs water/a drink and "dah" when he finishes his meal and shows his hands - that means he needs to clean them NOW :)

He loves listening to music - anasheed from Shoutul Harakah, Shoutul 'Amal and Harris Shaffix's Keimanan song. He'll ask for those, pointing to the laptop and saying "gu" - that's for lagu. And how do we know he loves those songs? Because he will be asking for repeats and whenever we turn to any other than those he'll be upset and asking for them again - with more signs than words of course :). Err and he seems to love moving/shaking his body to the beat - ouch ouch :D.

He's sleeping (alhamdulillah - thats a great blessing!) and eating well after weaning totally off breastmilk a few months ago - thanks to the help of my parents and lil bro Zak - and he now loves drinking from "real" cups rather than the training ones :). He has been able to feed himself with hands or using spoon - we've trained him to do so since he was eight or nine months. *To those moms out there - you can help to coordinate their eyes+hands' movement through this mealtime practice. Find them a booster seat or a highchair and trust them with food in the bowl, hand or fork and spoon (plastic ones). And DONT WORRY TOO MUCH about the mess they'll make. Your child's EDUCATION and DEVELOPMENT are MORE IMPORTANT than your house being tip top clean all the time RIGHT? It's great to feed them with your hands once in a while, but not all the time if we want them to learn these living skills from young. You might find a big, washable plastic bip that covers the body with a bit of shoulders helpful and putting a plastic mat/cover on the floor, under the chair, if it helps to reduce you messy worries :).

He loves to read especially books illustrated with animals and machines (I guess that's why Bob the Builder is so popular among kids) and he loves helping ummi to clean the house - dengan penyapu dan kain lap - other than his favourite toys - the washing machine (he knows how to load and unload the clothes and pushing the button "on") and Mr. Hoover a.k.a the vacuum cleaner :).

He prays everytime ummi or abi prays (or anyone else around), saying "ALlah, ALlah" (the L sounds a bit like a W) all the time. Standing and doing the ruku'-sujud mix and the tahiyyah sitting. And the funny part is, he'll point out the index finger/forefinger from both hands uttering "ALlah, ALlah" again and again ;) (if you don't - of course we don't - he'll find your other forefinger and pull it up, erk!). He has recently discovered giving salam to the right and lately being voluntary to offer prayers holding both hands up and uttering a whisper like prayer (whatever it is) :). He will never let ummi and abi read a book or use the laptop alone without his company :) - though he'll "read" the book upside down and simply clicks the mouse or shut the computer down (using the start button).

He's a bit clingy now, maybe because he knows the little one's coming and the fear of separation has starting to develop since having his first few - short though - experience in the nursery when ummi and abi attended a parenting motivation seminar recently. And maybe because he misses the days when Atuk, Opah and Uncle Zak were around - he's always entertained and well looked after mashaAllah - ummi and abi are trying to do the same sayang :). He's teething then and again but he hasn't filled his jaws yet. 'Ala kuli haal he's growing and developing fine alhamdulillah and subhanallah so fast. He' a real heartthrob, he waves a hi and bye to everyone who passes, EVERYONE and especially guests going out the door. He'll offer a salam and kiss on the hand when you ask him to do so with a sweet "Muah" and "Bye" at the end. Most of all, he's simply ummi's kind little company though sometimes ummi does not know how to keep him entertain and busy when ummi has other chores to complete.

sharing some tips from the parenting motivation seminar - how to develop an Islamic Worldview in your child :
- teach them to 1) LOVE ALLAH
2) LOVE RASULULLAH
3) LOVE AL-QUR'AN

- create an environment that'll expose them and instil love to these three thing
- educate them about their importance
- ESPECIALLY FOR US WHO LIVES IN THE WEST: always care to explain why we are different (ghuraba') from the disbelievers, why we don't or do things ... we ourselves should be an exemplary figure that appreciates our culture and way of life not the lifestyle loved and portrayed by the WEST - don't teach them to be proud of being a British BUT a MUSLIM!

hope we'll benefit from this great info, simply said but it is indeed another quest or struggle (I've been using these words too often?) ... 'ala kulli haal, enjoy parenthood and the blessings of having those beautiful little people friends! :)

moga anak ummi dan abi jadi anak yang soleh dengan akhlaq terpuji!

ahlan ya ramadhan!

2006-09-22T22:09:00.000-08:00

Keyfa haalukum jamee'an?

How time flies ... and ramadhan is here again! Walhamdulillah :). Muslims in soton are welcoming the first day of ramadhan today (23rd Sept, 2006) ... erm so everyone out there - sotonians - don't forget that there'll be no breakfast and lunch today but the best meal ever inshaAllah during IFTAR :)

* From Abu Hurairah r.anhu, Rasulullah s.a.w said: [Allah Taala rewards one who fasts with TWO happiness, ONE: when he breaks his fast and ANOTHER: when he meets his Creator in the hereafter. Sahih Muslim]

Ramadhan is a path towards attaining and improving our taqwa, not through mere fasting and praying rituals but through the essence which lies beneath the act of fasting and the unique blessings of ramadhan itself.

* 2: 183 "O ye who believe! Fasting is prescribed to you as it was prescribed to those before you, that ye may (learn) self-restraint,-"

The goal of fasting or shall we say the end result we're striving for in the Quest of Ramadhan is self-restraint or Taqwa (which I believe means a lot more than simply self-restraint) has been mentioned clearly by the Almighty, yet attaining what Taqwa really means and enduring its challenges are not as easy as it may seem.

Physical fasting alone might benefit us in many ways as explained by various medical research, but abstaining oneself from the evil within us and the temptations outwards to do things which might be unnecessary - wasteful - lagha, or bad - disobedient - munkar, and increasing our love, devotion and awareness of the Greatest Lord (Allahuakbar), in every step we make, and every breath we take means having a lot (thats A LOTTTT!) of patience and effort to do good and to reject its opposites, and perseverance to be steadfast on our daily pursuit of attaining Taqwa and His pleasure InshaAllah.

Hmm ... this Ramadhan means a lot to me. I hope I can complete the fasting month by fasting because I was not able to have a full 30 days of Ramadhan last time (during my 1st pregnancy). The doctor said I can't no longer fast when Ramadhan was about to end in a week's time then. But InshaAllah (please make du'a for me friends), I hope Allah will bless me with good health and ease my quest to fulfil my little struggle which is still far from enough for this Taqwa journey.

To my family and friends all over the world :), I've been a bit (or was it SOOO) busy lately and blogger went 'kong' for sometime, therefore I had to leave the blog 'unattended' and unupdated. Nonetheless, I hope to be able to put up some informative articles and to let my little mind and heart express their thoughts from time to time so that we can share some good things on the net inshaAllah. Sharing knowledge (at least) is a bit of da'wah everyone can try doing right?

Welcoming any informative/educational emails on any subject from my dearest friends, but NO GOSSIPS or NONSENSE pleaseee ! (and of course, enough of Siti and Datuk K's matter filling my inbox :( - I beg you!)

until this pen writes again, may Allah bless us all with patience, strength and wisdom to endure this quest, to understand why we're here today(in ad-dunyaa) and how we should walk through this worldly life to the path of the everlasting aakhirah ... forgive me for all my wrongdoings and please don't forget us in your du'as, ramadhan kareem mubarak!

Allah Knows Best and we know NOT!

Parenting Skills [2]

2006-09-16T21:48:00.000-08:00

continuation ...

Subject: a*i*d*a : parenting skills (vol 1)

Asm wbt,

Those who follow the last email might remember the first step of successful parenting is playing with your child. 2nd layer of parenting pyramid is PRAISE your child. One of the method to encourage good behaviours. Parents often use praise only for extraordinary good behaviours or excellent academic performance. We rarely praise them for playing quietly or going to bed on time. Research indicates lack of attention and praise to good behaviours can lead to inappropriate/misbehaviour. Some parents also mistakenly give praise selectively eg only when they satisfied with the finish result, instead of praising their child on small steps towards that final results/good behaviour.

Praise can be in the form of words, smile, hugs or even a pat on the back. Freely available, so use them.

How to praise more effectively?

1. Be specific

When praising, be specific and mention the good behaviour in your praise. Praise like 'good boy', 'good girl' is too general and not helping in encouraging good behaviour in your child. Labelled praise like 'Good boy, for playing nicely with your sister' or 'Thank you hanan for eating your meal at the table' is more effective in telling your child, what behaviour is good. By doing this you encourage them to continue the behaviour.

2. Show enthusiasm

praise with good tone of voice, smile and eye contact. the praise should be stated with care and sincerity.

3. Avoid combining praise and negative critics/punishers

some parents give praise and without realising it, they contadict it. Basically they praise the child and being sarcastic at the same time. For eg. 'I like when you eating your breakfast , but next time can you do it on time so that we wont be late for school', 'Good boy for doing your bed, but why cant you do it every moring?' These kind of praise will remind the children that they are not good enough and indirectly highlight the negative behaviour itself.

4. Praise immediately

effective praise is when you praise the child within 5 secs of the positive behaviour starts. This means if you want to encourage new behaviour, you should watch the first step ie holding the toy to put it in the box after playing, try to put on their shirt etc. dont wait till the room is clear from toys or they manage to get dress from head to toe. Just praise them immeditaley, this will motivate them to try harder to complete the task, just give them time.

Simple tips ...

Write down what good behaviour that you want to develop in your child, and work on them.

Starts with the simplest one eg putting shoes at shoe rack, hanging coat properly or even sitting down for meal.

Do praise them in front of other people/family members.

Hopefully this will benefit all of you out there.

Parenting Skills [1]

2006-09-13T08:13:00.000-08:00

a nice email sent to me contains this ...

Subject: a*i*d*a : parenting skills (vol 1)

Asm wbt,

For those needing some tips and help in handling your kids, you might find these guidelines useful. These trouble-shooting is specifically design for 3-8yrs old childrens. As this can be a difficult time for both parents and children. The social and emotional development of children during these period is incredible, so enjoy every step of the growth by believing yourself, learning from your mistakes and imperfection, getting support from others and most importantly having fun with your kids.

Foundation For Successful Parenting

1. Play with your child

Why? Bcoz play benefits your child in many ways, being creative, build up confidence, learn how to relate with others, express themselves etc.

Widespread mistake in any society..play is unproductive, a waste of time. "she's only playing", "stop playing around". With all these academic and social expectation, children missing their prime time to develop through play. And on top of that adult's intervention is needed to stimulate these developments. Through play you can help your child to solve problem, test out ideas and build a warm relationship between you and him/her.

How to play?

a) use a toy/game that suitable with their age but let them choose

b) follow your child lead : meaning DONT INSTRUCT,DONT CRITISE, DONT ASK ANY QUESTION. Bear these in mind when play with your child, your will be suprise how difficult it is to keep these rules and sitting next to him/her. the idea is to let them use their instict, imagination rather than imposing your own. if they want to put an elephant on top of a block of tower, put draw a horse on sky..let them, it is just a play. this approach will also encourage them to think independently.

c) Pace the play to suit your child :your will find that most children like repetitive activity, thus they might choose the same toy/activity again and again. these is part of them, they like routine things. let them play according to their tempo, dont push them just bcoz you're bored. remember, childrens minds moves slowly from one idea to another compared to adults. so let them take their own time to take another step, these will help to expand their attention span and encourage them to concentrate on one activity for a period of time.

d) praise your child's ideas n creativity : play does not have to make sense to you. a horse can fly, or a truck can talk and swim..just praise them correctly. eg 'wow that is clever the green truck can swim'.' how exciting, you painted your elephant yellow'. Praise secifically so that your child know what is it that you're praising. by doing this you encourage him/her to continue being creative.

e) be an appreciative audience : some parents getting too involved and ignore their children or end up take over the play. When play with your child, focus on them, not getting too involved on what you are doing. give them praise or applaud.

f) use descriptive commenting : perents accasionally ask so many question when they engage with play "what animal is this?" why do you colour the tree?" etc. some of us believe that's the only way to show some interest with the play. why not try the descriptive commenting technique. it is where you doing a running commentary of what your child's activity during play. in simple words decribe waht you see. eg. "very good, now you putting the blue block on top of the red" and so forth. by doing this you teach them the colour,activity/vocab and at the same time not interfering the play. you might found it uncomfortable at first, but if doing it persistently you will find that you child enjoy the attention you give them.

Be prepared for times when your child plays inappropriately or misbehave, if the behavior can be ignore ie not desruptive/dangerous just turn your face away and once they behave apparopriately turn back to them and continue play with them. by doing these you indirectly telling them that they can only get the attention if they play nicely. if on the other hand they starting to play dangerously eg throwing toys to you you can stop the play by saying "when you throw the block, we have to stop playing".

and remember to give some idea to your child about stopping the play. about 5 minutes before ending the play you can say "ok, in afew minutes I will stop playing with you, I really enjoy palying,we will continue the play tomorrow/etc". Distract your child on something else. Walk away and ignore any plead (if any). Just spend 10mins/day to play with them. they will know their limit if you show that you already give 10mins full concentartion to them and they cant manipulate you. Once they learn this, the protest will becoming less.

Do try and remember enjoy your time with them..

to be continued...insyaAllah

I can't sleep

2006-09-11T17:25:00.000-08:00

my eyes are closely shut
but my heart is far from leap
it cries, it laughs, it weeps
and my mind goes deep
into thoughts ...

my body is tired
but I can't feel weak
when my heart is yearning,
in hunger and in need,
of moving reminders,
sweet soul breathers,
loving touch and kind gestures,
from people who loves God
and strives for His pleasure!

and such moments are the sweetest memories ...

khaleel el-wafy @2:am sept 12, 2006

Building Self-Esteem in Your Child

2006-08-26T15:15:00.000-08:00

http://www.tuanguru.net

One of the most important things that parents can do for their children is to help them develop high self-esteem and a positive self image. Self-esteem is an evaluation of the information contained in a person's self-concept. Self-concept is the combination of terms that a person uses to describe him/herself. Self-esteem is important because it is seen as a central factor in positive social and emotional adjustment. Children with high self-esteem are capable of making good decisions, are proud of their accomplishments, and are willing to take responsibility and ready to cope with frustration. Also, they are more socially competent, they perform better in school, and are more likely to avoid future serious problems such as school dropout and drug use.

Parents and the family environment obviously play a critical role in the development of high self-esteem. When children feel that they are listened to, taken seriously, and genuinely cared for, their self-esteem is high. Here are a few suggestions that can improve your child's self-esteem.

1) Nurture the Special Gifts from Allah.

Each child is born in a natural state of submission to Allah (fitrah) and along with this comes a unique personality, temperament, skills, abilities, and special gifts from Allah. These gifts are given to a child for a purpose, and they should be nurtured and allowed to develop to their fullest capacity. Parents play an important role in this area, in that they first need to determine what those gifts are, and then find ways to enhance them. This task will become easier as the child develops, but certain elements are already apparent at an early age. Academics, hobbies, organizations, sports, and other special interests are all means that these special gifts can be nurtured. This point is especially emphasized for girls who are often ignored in this regard. If a child's natural abilities are not allowed to grow, this will have obvious implications for self-esteem. If a child is forced into an area in which there is no interest or ability, he or she will be more likely
to have low-esteem, and will probably not live up to the expectations of his/her parents.

2) Communicate With Your Child.

An amazing statistic is that the average American child spends 1680 minutes per week in front of a machine (TV) and only 38.5 minutes in a meaningful conversation with his/her parents. No wonder children lack social skills and families have so many problems. It is very important that parents communicate with their children EVERY DAY, not only for self-esteem enhancement, but for many other reasons. The most critical element for effective communication is listening (really listen). This means giving your child undivided attention, putting aside your feelings and opinions for a moment, and trying to understand those of your child. His ideas, emotions, and feelings should be taken seriously. A parent should show the child that what they do is important and talk with them about their activities and interests. It will obviously be necessary to express values and beliefs, but this should be done in a calm manner and be accompanied with a rationale. Problems should be discussed without placing blame or commenting on a child's character. If children know that there is a problem but don't feel attacked, they are more likely to help find a solution.

3) Foster Responsibility and lndependence.

Ultimately our children will need to make decisions on their own and be accountable to Allah for their own actions. An important component of a healthy self-esteem and sound decision-making is the opportunity to learn and develop these skills. Parents should help their children learn these decision-making and problem-solving skills and encourage the children to use them on a regular basis. These skills can be fostered by giving children responsibilities and gradually allowing them more freedom and control over their lives, especially as they get closer to adulthood. The responsibilities should be reasonable depending on the age of the child and the parent should give support when needed. Children who are given these opportunities will feel useful, valued, and competent. This will also increase the level of trust between parent and child which is a critical element in any relationship.

4) Love Your Child Abundantly.
This means showing, how much you care and telling your child that you love him/her on a regular basis. It also means spending time with your child whenever possible; playing games, talking, sharing favorite activities, taking a walk, praying and reading Qur'an. The list is endless. When parents talk with a child, they should use phrases that build self-esteem such as "Thank you for helping," "That was an excellent idea!," "You are terrific!," "What a nice job!," "Masha' Allah." Praise, recognition, special privileges, or increased responsibility may be given for accomplishments and successes. Physical contact is very important such as pats on the back, hugs, strokes, kisses. A sense of humor also goes a long way in dealing with many situations and for strengthening the parent-child relationship. We should remind ourselves that Prophet Muhammad, sallallaahu alayhe wa sallam, was always kind, respectful, and affectionate toward children.

These are just a few of the ways that parents can develop and improve the self esteem of their children. Once a child has acquired a positive feeling about him/herself, this will filter over into other areas of life and the child will become more successful, competent and self-confident. High self-esteem not only has positive implications for the child but also for the family as it shares, grows, and strengthens. This will make the bonds of the family strong and create a beautiful environment for parents and children which is part of the overall plan that Allah has set for the family unit.

Source : Internet,By Dr. Aisha Hamdan

yesterday and today, notes to remember ...

2006-06-07T18:52:00.000-08:00

* untuk kak ida @moi, andainya ukhti menjengah saya ... asifah, moga segera dapat kembali berhubung!
---
selalu aku tahu, ingat dan mengerti ... kata-kata alBanna yg bak lafaz wajib semua yg mengenal mujahid besar alIkhwan alMuslimun ini ... "Kewajipan lebih banyak daripada masa yang ada!"

tapi ... aku masih boleh lena dalam tidur yang panjang!

bila arRasul disapa Jibril dengan wahyu pertama, dan dia kembali mendapatkan Khadijah dan menyelimuti seluruh tubuhnya ... didn't ALlah revealed to Him al-Muddaththir?

‘O you (Muhammad [pbuh]) enveloped (in garments)! Arise and warn! And your Lord (Allah) magnify! And your garments purify! And keep away from Ar-Rujz (the idols)!’

[Al-Qur'an 74:1-5]

hmmmppppppppppppppppppppppppppp! and people 'need'ed time for themselves, oh why?

sekadar coretan hari itu, mungkin salah, mungkin benar, ALlah Knows Best and ye know NOT!

----

bahagianya menjadi isteri, dan betapa indahnya kehidupan seorang ibu ...

hanya Tuhan yang tahu!

tapi terkadang, tercuit rasa hati ... memikirkan betapa dan betapa sedikitnya masa untuk diri sendiri. bak kata orang bujang - "they need time for themselves".

mungkin aku sinis, tapi kata seperti itu buat hati berdetik nakal, dan senyum sendiri ;).

membaca kurang. berfikir bila ada kesempatan. bersosial hanya bila online? atau ada yg rajin ziarah ke teratak teman. entahlah, dalam bilik air pun sentiasa bergegas. bimbang lama2 si kecil main sorang2, kalau tak pun awal2 lagi menangis ummi dah 'hilang'. setiap hari bangun tidur, menguruskan suami dan si kecil, masak, membasuh, mengemas bla bla bla bla sampai tidur waktu malam. most of my time - spent with my little child, husband and doing the house chores ...

erm sekejap, si kecil baru balik. anak-anak dara yg rajin tadi singgah sebelum ke kedai dan minta bawa si kecil bersama. aku ok saja. abi pun kata tak apa. si kecil ikut kakak-kakak, abi ke pejabat pula. ummi?

ummi sendiri. bermenung... bila handzalah tak ada ummi pun tak tahu nak buat apa. ummi nak lipat kain, nak gosok baju, nak kemas rumah ... nak, nak, nak tapi semangat tiada. ummi rasa sunyi seluruh jiwa, buah hati ummi kedua-duanya tiada. alahai, baru sekejap saja, ummi sudah serba tak kena!

masa yang ummi harap ada untuk segala kesempatan yg tiada, sudah tiba, tapi tak terasa inginkan apa-apa bila anak ummi dan si dia tak bersama-sama. macamana agaknya hidup untuk diri sendiri? apa ertinya masa untuk sendiri saja? entahlah, diri pun tak mengerti mungkin kerana sedari kecil terdidik untuk hidup bersama dan kerana semua ... dan sebab hidup ini asal dan akhirnya kerana Dia, berkhidmat semampu ada pastilah tujuan kita ...

erm, mungkin sedikit yg aku perlu adalah kekuatan (semangat dari mereka) dan kesanggupan untuk mengorbankan waktu rehat dan lena, untuk kembali mencari ilmu dan mengasah minda malah melaksanakan tuntutan-tuntutan hidup yg lain selain yg termetri dalam rumahtangga ... aku tak perlu masa sendiri saja, malah aku tak inginkannya!

syukurlah andai suami memahami dan meringankan berat beban di bahu kita ... syukurlah dengan anak-anak yg sinar mata mereka menyuluh harap dan ceria di jiwa ...

lukluk menulis akhirnya,
1749pm, 19/5/06

the bitter truth

2006-02-23T10:13:00.000-08:00

It has been so long
since the last time
I've talked to you

I miss the moments
to simply tell you things
and ask for your views

my heart is yearning,
longing to please you
my mind is complaining
that I've been neglecting you
I knew, and I knew ...
yet so little time have I spent
to seek and remember you ...

this emptiness that fills my soul
is not anything new
the reasons and the causes
I've long understood and knew
yet every day
and in every way
I'll lose you
to my wordly likings
to my worldly views
and my struggling nafs
that fails ...
to submit to your will
to surrender to the ultimate truth

how could I love
yet seldom care
for the Most Loving and Oft Forgiving YOU?!

* oh ALlah, don't leave to myself
I shall go astray ...
oh ALlah, don't leave me to myself
I shall fade away ... *

khaleel el-wafy
feb 2006, lot7

a note on the 'bitter' truth about knowledge and intelligence (not wisdom) ... we seek and acquire, but do we put them into practice? adakah ilmu dan bijak akal memberikan kita lebih daya manipulasi untuk mengadakan alasan-alasan dalam hidup ini ... adakah kita benar-benar lupa akan seru-seruNya atau sengaja melupakan apa yang tidak enak pada nafsu dan rasa?

adakah ...

selamat hari lahir untukmu ...

2006-01-17T10:44:00.000-08:00

Nota buat Marwan Syaheed di hari lahirmu yg pertama

(18 Jan 2006)

nota ini buat anakanda,
meski 23 tahun bersenggang usia
taqdirNya ...
tarikh ini kita kongsi bersama

Marwan mungkin tak mengenali,
malah wajahmu tak sempat khalah tatapi,
kerna saat dunia mendengar tangisanmu,
khalah dalam debar rindu,
menanti kelahiran adikmu ...

nota ini sayang,
khalah tuliskan penuh kerinduan,
yg telah lama khalah sematkan,
utk yg sepertimu ...
sinar harapan ummah di masa hadapan!

Marwan nanti ingatkan mamamu,
walau dunia berubah dan
waktu berganti waktu,
khalah di sini senantiasa mengharapkan,
kalian dalam khair,
rahmat dan redha arRahman,
dan tak pernah khalah lupakan,
manis ukhuwwah,
kasih berlandaskan iman,
yg sama kami tautkan,
yg sama kami suburkan,
'aqad perjuangan ini ...
jangan pernah meninggalkan,
dan kerana Allah,
usah sekali-kali biar ditinggalkan!

seindah dan segagah namamu Marwan,
moga syahid jadi impian dan perjuangan,
ingatilah selalu,
hari-hari ibu dan ayahmu,
mencambah benih iman,
biar tumbuh pohon taqwa,
meneduhmu dari terik dunia,
biar berbuah 'ilmu dan adab,
memberi manfaat,
pada jiwa-jiwa nan lapar dan lahap ...

buatmu Marwan Syaheed,
cita-cita kami,
warisan generasi ke generasi,
perjuangan yg sudah terpikul,
dan du'a yg diharapkan kabul,
moga cita-cita ini,
beroleh redha dan pertolonganNya,
dan moga melaluinya,
tiba kita ke firdaus al-a'la,
untuk bertemu lagi,
dalam pertemuan yg dirindukan lagi abadi!

khalahmu,
khaleel el-wafy: January 2006/Dzulhijjah 1426H, rumah furze.

-----------------------------------------------------------------
p/s: juga buat yg segenerasi dan xdpt dikenali/diingati semuanya ....
'Umair Raqib + 'Azzam + Nurin Mazaya + Siti Aisyah + Siti Humairah, Hurun 'Ain, Amaani Syaheeda, Hannani Batrisyia, Iman Kamil, Nafeesatul Wafa' dll.
-------------------------------------
khalah : makcik sebelah ibu
khair : kebaikan
-------------------------------------------------------------------

abah warded, pls make du'a for him and all of us. Jazakumullah khairal jazaa'

'eid mubarak!

2006-01-12T00:31:00.000-08:00

assalamu'alaikum frens,

wishing 'eid mubarak to all - late though!

its already 12 Dzulhijjah :D ... alhamdulillah, we had a modest-but-nice 'Eidul Adha here ... having Uncle Ij around, a nice 'Eid-gift-package arrived one day before the big day *jazakumullah khairal jazaa' to the Sevenlords* plus a nice nasi lemak breakfast with 4 lovely guests on 'Eid morning (and managed to cook rendang 'apa dah jadi?' :D) >> 'Eidul Adha had its own sunshine on me! :)

Handzalah has been coughing (and his nose running badly) for the past few days ... mama would have said, "poor little fella" if she sees him now ... he had a hard time on bed, can't really sleep ... pusing sana sini, mata tak boleh buka tapi nak tidur pun dada tak habis-habis bekerja ... BUT he enjoyed the 'attention' given to him, asking everyone to play with him and pick him up whenever he needs a lift! wah wah ... tak sihat pun kemain aktif lagi anak ummi :) especially now he knows how to climb up the sofas and beds and how to safely get down to the floor again .. erm but 'safely' doesn't mean he could be left without 'adult supervision' - that's TOO DANGEROUS!

this little fella is indeed one of the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me! he's sick yet he plays, smiles and laughs whenever he can (though he cries a lot more than he does usually) ... he still 'dance' - moving his body from left to right and forward - whenever he listens to the rhythm of a song or dzikr ... he babbles around and only consume his favourite dish - which happens to be pasta ;) ... sometimes he's weak and tired, yet he's sooo positive whenever there's energy in his body ...

thinking of how wonderful a little baby could be - due to his innocence to life - expresses his feelings of happiness and frustration freely ... sigh a little less and appreciate every minute of his life exploring, learning and yearning for love, attention and every single thing that he perceives in a positive view and rarely the opposite ...

and i wonder how much we, in our 'living diaries', portrayed negativity and hypocrisy and not to forget ungratefulness for everything we have and need ... how much we sigh and hide ... and how much we pay great attention for things we've lost, things we couldn't get, people we couldn't love and vice versa and so many other little things ... YET FAILED to see, observe and appreciate the greatness of the ni'mah He gives in every single breath we breathe, every single word we utter, everyone we love and loved us, everything we consume, everything gained and everything everything everything ...

how i wonder!

Excellence of the Day of `Arafah

2006-01-07T22:41:00.000-08:00

so what do you want and seek?

don't forget to fast and pray ... He's never far away ... ALlahHaafiz!

---

By Sheikh Sayyed Sabiq

Jabir reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “The ten days of the month of Dhul-Hijjah are the best days in the sight of Allah.” A man asked, “Are these days better than an equivalent number of days that are spent fighting for the cause of Allah?” The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) answered, “They are better than an equivalent number of days spent fighting in the cause of Allah. And there is no day better in the sight of Allah than the Day of `Arafah. On this day Allah, the Almighty and the Exalted One, descends to the nearest heaven, and He is proud of His slaves on the earth and says to those in heaven, ‘Look at My servants. They have come from far and near, with hair disheveled and faces covered with dust, to seek My mercy, even though they have not seen My chastisement. Far more people are freed from the Hellfire on the Day of `Arafah than on any other day. ’”

Ibn Al-Mubarak reported from Sufyan Ath-Thawri, from Az-Zubayr ibn `Ali, from Anas ibn Malik that he said: The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) spent the day at `Arafah until almost sunset. Then he said, “O Bilal, ask the people to be quiet and listen to me.” Bilal stood up and asked the people to be quiet and listen to the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him). When the people were quiet, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “O people, a little while ago Gabriel (peace and blessings be upon him) came to me. Gave me salutations from Allah and informed me that Allah has forgiven those who spend the Day at `Arafah and those who stop at Al-Mash`ar Al-Haram, and that He has guaranteed their debts.”

At this `Umar ibn Al-Khattab stood up and asked, “O Allah’s Messenger, is this for us only?” The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “This is for you and for all those who will come after you until the Day of Judgment.” `Umar exclaimed, “How plentiful and blissful Allah’s bounties are!”

Muslim and others have reported from `A’ishah that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Allah frees far more people from Hellfire on the Day of `Arafah than on any other day, and Allah comes closer this day and proudly says to the angels, ‘What do these people want and seek?’”

Abu Ad-Darda reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “On no other day does the Satan feel so belittled, humiliated, and angry as he does on the Day of `Arafah.” The reason for this is the mercy of Allah that descends (this day) and the forgiveness that He grants to people for major sins, except the day of the Battle of Badr, which witnessed a far greater mercy of Allah descending upon people, which caused great sadness to Satan.

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was asked, “O Prophet of Allah, what did Satan see on the day of the Battle of Badr?” “He saw Gabriel leading the troops of angels,” he replied (Reported by Malik and Al-Hakim).

source: islam-online

---
(excerpts from First 10 Days of Dzulhijjah :What To DO?)

Fasting: It is Sunnah to fast on the ninth day of Dhul-Hijjah, because the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) urged us to do good deeds during this time, and fasting is one of the best of deeds. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) used to fast on the ninth of Dhul-Hijjah. Hunaydah Ibn Khalid quoted some of the wives of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) as saying: "The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) used to fast on the ninth of Dhul-Hijjah, on the day of `Ashurah, on three days of each month, and on the first two Mondays and Thursdays of each month." (Reported by An-Nisa'i, 4/205)

talk-about-babies [part 3]

2006-01-06T06:27:00.000-08:00

when your 'baby' goes to school ...

reading: "Bicara Kalbu: Baca doa pada ubun-ubun anak nyatakan harapan"

notes:
1) TALK to your children (that includes LISTENING and great patience eh? :)) - know their likes, dislikes, fears etc. - comfort them by talking to them not only when problems occur - create a free and healthy environment for communication in your family

2) 'Pujuk'/ Consoling skills - don't leave them in the 'dark' (negative feelings )

3) don't break their TRUST - when you leave them at school (or anywhere), makesure you'll be back to pick them up on time. our children trust us, don't waste it by undermining their little hopeful yet very observant hearts

4) DO NOT persuade them to do things (all the time) by buying them sweets or expensive toys - rewarding them for good deeds is encouragement but do not over-reward them >> they might end up misundertanding our intentions and being materialistic - try to make them understand why

5) be firm and consistent on rules and decisions, not only to them BUT TO YOURSELF FIRST - when they cry the minute you leave them at school (which will break your heart for the first few moments), remind yourself that it is for their own good and they'll get used to it. let them (and ourselves?) cry now rather than later >> when they're too old to be taught about being independent!

6) give them time to learn and adjust - they need it as much or more than us, and as every child is unique some might need more time than others

7) PRAY FOR THEIR SUCCESS - you're a MOM, and as Allah has blessed you with one of the greatest role in the world and your prayers are indeed special!

-----

Handzalah took his first few steps last night! He put up a show for his beloved guests :):). Guess he might stand and walk on his own at the same time as he has been attempting to do so these few days ... go anak ummi go! We'll walk to the park together, 'soon' inshaALlah :)

*thanks aKo for the article

wajahmu dalam lena ...

2006-01-06T06:24:00.000-08:00

satu kedamaian
sebuah ketenangan
suatu kelegaan
usai sudah satu hari lagi
meniti cinta dan rindu
yang seringkali diuji
moga hati ini
tetap berpaut padaMu ...
ALLAHU RABBI!

khaleel el wafy
1034am.5jan06

the nice little things ...

2006-01-05T10:15:00.000-08:00

in life that we've always forgotten ...

(cerita hari itu...)

had a fast walk to the shop this morning (top up time!), i walked so fast because we only had 6p left! - the modem, heater and other electrical goods are no longer working ... i walked with nothing much in mind not even thinking of whatever is available to my sight and other senses (nak cepatlah katakan :D) ... on the way back i came across a nice old lady with her family ... she walked pass me, smiled and said: "isn't it a nice peaceful day?" ...

:) subhanallah ... it is! it is a nice sunny morning despite the cold winter breeze - and it feels great! i should have appreciate it when i walk pass through the university as there were very few people around ... it was so quiet and peaceful ...

it is a simple saying, a simple comment on another lovely morning (perhaps), yet from a meaningful observation - it made me smile and slowed down my pace, opened my eyes and hearing to the beauty of Allah's grace ... subhanallah, walhamdulillah, wa laa ilaaha illallah, wallahuakbar!

its another day to live
the lovely sky
the soothing sunshine
and the calming breeze ...
yet i couldn't see it sometimes
being unthankful nor appreciative
the blessings are everywhere
yet often ignored rather than perceived
had the extreme weather left my heart to freeze?

(cerita hari ini ...)

the ayah: "Fa bi ayyi aalaa-i rabbikuma tukadzibaan" [Then which of the favours of your Lord will ye deny?] was mentioned 31 times in surah ar-Rahman, in which He tells us about the ni'mahs we've been blessed everyday, everywhere with, the Day of judgment, paradise and hell ...

its like a question asked for 31 times and still we fail to keep it in mind ...

an-nas (men) wan nisyan (forgetfulness), will we ever get over it?!!

astaghfirullahal 'adzim, astaghfirullahal 'adzim, astaghfirullahal 'adzim ...

allahummakhtimlana bihusnil khatimah wa la takhtim 'alaina bisu-il khatimah ...

Blessed be the name of thy Lord, full of Majesty, Bounty and Honour [55:78]

A Little Effort Goes a Long Way

2006-01-03T13:52:00.000-08:00

(article from islam-online.net)

By Muhammad Fathi**
Jan. 3, 2006

Have you missed some of the precious time of the previous Ramadan? Do you feel you could have done more in that blessed month? Are you disappointed with your performance during the last ten days of Ramadan and feel an overwhelming yearning for the spirituality of Laylat Al-Qadr?

Well, you have another chance!

It is out of Allah's mercy that He bestows upon us blessed times in which rewards are multiplied. These seasons of goodness recur time after time, so that we can recharge our spiritual batteries and keep our hearts alive. Nowadays, we are witnessing one of them — the first 10 days of Dhul-Hijjah.

You certainly must have read or heard about the greatness of these days and the indescribable amount of forgiveness and mercy that Allah bestows upon people during them. Now that these days have already started, it is time for deeds, not words. The intelligent person is one who takes full advantage of every minute and every second, and this is not so difficult. There are many ways to achieve goodness, and with little effort you can get much reward.

Hajj: The Fifth Pillar of Islam

The first and foremost act of worship in these days is Hajj. If you are going to observe it this year, then try your best to gain as much reward as possible. This is your real chance to become wholly absolved of your sins and have your record wiped clean. So spare no effort in perfecting your rituals, and keep away from anything that may blemish your Hajj. During the journey, make use of your time through constant supplication, remembrance of Allah, and recitation of the Qur'an. Who knows, this may be your last journey to the Sacred House.

Reward of Hajj in Your Homeland

You may be unable to do Hajj this year, and you may feel sad because you are deprived of the great reward of Hajj. But you can also achieve this reward in your country of residence. Just reflect on the following hadith:

Whoever prays Fajr Prayer in congregation, and then sits and remembers Allah until the sun rises, then (after a while) prays two rak`ahs, he will gain a reward equal to that of making perfect Hajj and `Umrah. [The Prophet repeated the word "perfect" thrice.] (At-Tirmidhi)

It's so easy, isn't it?

Back to the Qur'an

It is time also to dust off your copy of the Qur'an and return to its refuge. Make these 10 days the beginning of a systematic and strong relationship with it. It's important to know that reading one letter of the Qur'an earns you 10 rewards. In this way, reading Surat Al-Fatihah — which doesn't take more than two minutes — will give you more than one thousand rewards. This is on ordinary days, so what about these great days! Certainly the reward will be far greater.

Furthermore, there are some surahs that have special merits. Reading Surat Al-Ikhlas (surah 112), for example, is equal to reading one third of the Qur'an (Al-Bukhari and Muslim). Regular recitation of Surat Al-Mulk (surah 67) intercedes for its reader (Abu Dawud), and reading Ayat Al-Kursi (Al-Baqarah 2:255) when going to sleep protects you from Satan for the whole night (Al-Bukhari).

Fasting: Evoking the Spirit of Ramadan

It is a good idea to evoke the spirituality of Ramadan by fasting during these blessed days. Remember that observing the voluntary fast for day keeps you away from Hell. In a hadith, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said,

Anyone who fasts for one day for Allah's pleasure, Allah will keep his face away from the (Hell) fire for (a distance covered by a journey of) seventy years. (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

This is during ordinary days. Of course there is even more reward during these blessed days.

Day of `Arafah

On the day of `Arafah, Allah showers His mercy on the pilgrims and forgives all their sins. If you are not a pilgrim, you still can have a share of this forgiveness. All you have to do is to fast on the Day of `Arafah, and by doing that, Allah will forgive your sins for two whole years — the past year and the coming one.

Night Vigil Prayer

You always hear about the virtues of spending night in prayer, and you have actually tasted its sweetness in Ramadan nights. Why not revive this beautiful act of worship during these nights. You can add two or four extra rak`ahs after finishing `Isha' Prayer and before Witr Prayer.

In addition to that, there is another easy way to gain the reward of the night vigil prayer. It is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

He who attends `Isha' Prayer in congregation is as if he has performed salah for half of the night; and he who attends `Isha' and Fajr prayers in congregation, is as if he has performed salah for the whole night. (At-Tirmidhi)

The Golden Words

This is one of the easiest ways to gain treasures of reward. You can make dhikr wherever you are, at all times. You can make dhikr at your home, school, or workplace, and you can make it while you are driving, walking, traveling, and commuting. In addition, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) gave us guidance for reciting certain formulas of dhikr that have special reward. For example, Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

He who recites after every prayer: Subhan Allah (Allah is free from imperfection) thirty-three times; Al-hamdu lillah (praise be to Allah) thirty-three times; (Allah is Greatest) thirty-three times; and completes the hundred with: Allahu AkbarLa ilaha illallahu, wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu, wa Huwa `ala kulli shai'in qadir (there is no true god except Allah. He is One and He has no partner. His is the sovereignty and His is the praise, and He is Omnipotent), will have all his sins pardoned even if they may be as large as the foam on the surface of the sea. (Muslim)

Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with him) also reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

He who says Subhan-Allahi wa bihamdihi (Allah is free from imperfection and His is the praise) one hundred times a day, his sins will be obliterated even if they are equal to the extent of the foam of the sea. (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

Abu Ayyub Al-Ansari (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

He who utters ten times La ilaha illallahu, wahdahu la sharika lahu, lahulmulku wa lahulhamdu, wa Huwa `ala kulli sha'in qadir (There is no true god except Allah. He is One and He has no partner. His is the sovereignty and His is the praise, and He is Omnipotent), he will have a reward equal to that for freeing four slaves from the progeny of Prophet Isma`il. (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

To read more about these golden words, click here.

The Precious hours

In a wonderful hadith, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said that on the last third of every night, Allah Almighty calls to His servants:

Is there anyone to invoke Me, so that I may respond to his invocation? Is there anyone to ask Me, so that I may grant him his request? Is there anyone seeking My forgiveness, so that I may forgive him? (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

Why do we miss this golden opportunity? Now is the right time to expose yourself to His divine generosity and mercy. If you are going to fast during these days, you are most likely to wake up a little bit earlier than usual to have your sahur. So, seize the opportunity and pray two rak`ahs, and ask Allah to forgive your sins and to grant you happiness in this world and in the hereafter. Do not forget your brothers and sisters who suffer in Palestine, Iraq, Pakistan, and other countries.

The doors of goodness are numerous and wide open. There are many ways to Paradise, and the more time and effort you give, the more reward and blessings you will get.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

p/s: don't wait, lets just grab it! allahumma ...

** Muhammad Fathi is a Shari`ah assistant editor at IslamOnline. He graduated from Al-Azhar University’s Faculty of Languages and Translation, Islamic Studies in English, and is pursuing post-graduate studies. You can reach him at mohammad.fathi@iolteam.com.

talk-about-babies [part 2]

2005-12-29T03:32:00.000-08:00

[tidurlah sayang ...]

good eating habits - sufficient nutrition and quantity - will help develop good sleeping habits too! we've been "struggling" to put Handzalah to sleep on normal bedtime routine yet his sleeping disorder has been going on for months ... he's always awake when he sleeps at night yet peacefully sleeps in the morning ... and he'll always want to be fed and sleep in my arms ... why?

changing a habit is difficult especially when its tied to another ... the Health Visitor said that he didn't sleep well maybe because he didn't eat well, and a doc said that sleeping together with him and breastfeeding him to sleep won't help either ... everything's interrelated ...

how bad was the sleeping problem? well, I'll say enough to make ummi and abi zombies! staying awake all night and sleeping in the morning isn't my kind of style, not even during my college days- never stayed up to study and qadha' in the morning, nope not me! night sleep is too precious, it has a different feeling ... 8 hours in the morning would not equal a few good hours of night sleep ... as Allah has said in the Qur'an (excerpts from Tafsir Ibn Kathir - surah an-Naba'):

(And We have made your sleep as a thing for rest.) meaning, a cessation of movement in order to attain rest from the frequent repetition and going about in search of livelihood during the day. A similar Ayah has been mentioned previously in Surat Al-Furqan.

[وَجَعَلْنَا الَّيْلَ لِبَاساً ]

(And We have made the night as a covering,) meaning, its shade and darkness covers the people. This is as Allah says,

[وَالَّيْلِ إِذَا يَغْشَـهَا ]

(By the night as it conceals it.) (91:4) Qatadah commented;

[وَجَعَلْنَا الَّيْلَ لِبَاساً ]

(And We have made the night as a covering,) meaning, a tranquil residence. Concerning Allah's statement,

[وَجَعَلْنَا النَّهَارَ مَعَاشاً ]

(And We have made the day for livelihood.) meaning, `We made it radiant, luminous, and shining so that the people would be able to move about in it.' By it they are able to come and go for their livelihood, earning, business dealings and other than that as well.

i believe that we should dedicate our morning and day for chores and making a living, and our nights should be spent for rest and maybe sunnah prayers (solah, dzikr, reciting the
Qur'an) ... and i hope to train my son (the way my mother tried as much as she can to train us) to fulfill his duties in the mornings and the nights accordingly (as Allah ordained the human nature to be / sunnatullah) ... so that one day inshaallah, he could realize the meaning of "fursan fin nahaar wa ruhban fil layl" ...

he sleeps in the morning at about 8 or 9 a.m (try waking him up at this time and he'll cry his lungs out without even opening his eyes), and sometimes throughout the afternoon unless we take him out (one tried solution to his sleeping disorder) and he'll take a nap at about 6 or 7pm to 8 or 9 p.m and stay awake until the wee hours in the morning .. he might have a nap between those hours but a very very very short one! maybe for half an hour or less before he's awake
again, smiling and sitting on his back "ummi, its playtime again!" ;)

we had a cot back in malaysia but after 6 months he no longer wants to sleep in it ... was it already too small? and now we don't actually have room for one ... inshaallah, hopefully in 6 months time, we'll get a better house when the contract ends ...

so the solution that i could figure out after reading some materials about this problem is :
1) feed him well. as much as he wants and as often as he would take, for he consumes very little everytime. mama said i should give him a snack when he's up in the morning to make sure he's full and comfortable enough to get back to bed.

2) not feeding him to sleep. if he's already asleep i'll get him to the bed ASAP. if he's already sleepy after a meal or breastfeed, i'll get him to bed ASAP, pat his back and sang him lullabies to the dreamland or another "nice" solution is to let abi get him to bed. that works! he loves listening to abi's heartbeat too I guess :) in other words it is an attempt to change his sleep indicator - milk doesn't mean sleep - and to develop a particular sleeping environment/routine - the bed, the dark(with a little light though) ...

3) let him comfort himself when he's awake. if he suddenly cries during his sleep/nap, i won't quickly attend to him, pick him up and feed him - i'll let him find peace on his own for a
while if he doesn't really cry hard, but if he cries a bit louder (because of a nightmare etc.) i'll pat his back, and recite to him Quranic verses or dzikr or sing him lullabies until he sleeps again (abi does this better than i do because the baby won't get anything more than that from his father :D), unless he's really up for just a short feed ...

4) not to entertain him when he wants to play during bedtime. again, its about environment and routine. sleeping time is sleeping time dearest, ummi will play with you again tomorrow ... when he's bored, he'll know that's actually a cue for him to quit playing ...

5) keep him active in the day. if he hasn't sleep at all the night before, you can't never expect him to last until the afternoon. he'll sleep to the comforting morning breeze and even if you get him up and wash his face he'll get back to sleep again with a great fuss. but if ummi and abi takes him out, the environment outside usually is an eye opener to this little one. we've tested for a few times, if we bring him out in the day, he'll be sleeping earlier at night to rise and shine the next morning ... but to get him out everyday is a bit impossible especially in this cold weather, we don't want to take the risk of him getting any cold or fever ...

well ideals are usually easier said than done. not everything works everytime. there were occassions that he didn't sleep much in the day yet he still stay awake during the night. where did he get so much energy from? :) nevertheless, as dr. stoppard wrote, active-less sleeping children/children with sleeping disorder usually don't have any health issues yet could be very rewarding as they are sometimes openly affectionate to people ... and alhamdulillah, i believe that's true as I could see it now in Handzalah's loving character ... he's such a heartthrob!

[my few cents thoughts on parenting ...]

there's no easy way to perfect parenthood (well there's none actually - but we can be good at it). it takes a lot of learning and experience, trials and errors, as every child and parent are unique and different.

babies are one of the most wonderful creations of His. we want to love them and nourish them with every care and goodness in this world ... unfortunately sometimes we think its love but its actually discouraging our beloved ones to have a well-disciplined life from the beginning. and
sometimes we simply do not know what to do not to hurt them yet teach them what's right and wrong. to make it more complicated - there's too many information and resources - from family tradition to health sciences - what you know and what you don't from both and what is applicable from both also matters ... its hard to breastfeed when you didn't know that it shouldn't hurt (with correct methods and positioning), and its hard to remove a dummy/pacifier from your baby if its already a family thing from generation to generation (i don't use it though) ... things we've got used to might not be the things we should do ...

'ala kulli haal, this is another quest and jihaad for us parents - especially mothers - who received this great responsibility from the Creator, the day we conceived ... let that happiness from this great blessing be the source of strength and our motivator to help build another great muslim ummah by producing children in accordance to the guidance derived from the Qur'an and the Sunnah ...

last but not least, a hadeeth to ease and comfort our struggling souls through this journey:

"When a person dies, his action discontinues except for three: a continuing charity, or knowledge which proves to be of benefit, or a righteous son who supplicates for him"
([Narrated by Muslim] Sharh an-Nawawi [11/85])

Allah Knows Best.

talk-about-babies [part 1]

2005-12-28T10:34:00.000-08:00

[handzalah goes to town ...]

when handzalah goes to town ... he'll fall asleep in the car/bus, on the way to the town and back ... he will always sleep on the journey! (just like ummi did ;) - enjoying the ride in peace)

we were in town on Monday, yesterday and today!

not really for the boxing-day-craze, just shopping for goods during the lower-price-season :D ... well, we didn't join the craze - really! we went a bit late in the afternoon (not too early in the morning waiting for Next's door to open ;)) and we didn't buy much as well ... we only bought a few things for abuhandzalah "working wardrobe" and Handzalah's very own booster seat so that he can join us at the dining table and start eating well ... he has very little interest in food and still so much tempted to milk (breastfed), so abi and ummi decided to 'help' him with a nice booster seat bought from JohnLewis for ~~only~~ 25 pounds (is that cheap? i'm not so sure but it looks better than what Argos offer ...) ... we didn't look for any kat carboot, we don't even know how to get to any!

and today at last, we bought our monthly ration at ASDA and chicken from C&C ... and they were the reason why we went to town three consecutive days this week! boleh pulak ASDA tutup and C&C was out of stock for chicken everytime we reached their doors ... sabr, sabr :)

'ala kulli haal, alhamdulillah we managed to get everything we need ... need ... maybe thats why we're not so into the "craze" ... we only bought things we NEED, not WANT ... alhamdulillah .. its good too have "enough" money not to waste it on things and wants we'll never have enough of ...

back to my baby ...

[One for abi, another one for ummi and one for Handzalah ...]

... our cute little baby!

that's how ummi sings to Handzalah, persuading him to take his meals ... (and of course the first few spoons will have to be tasted by ummi first! ;)) ... Handzalah takes a long time to finish his meals ... and he usually take time not only to chew but even to be carried away with other interests ... it takes a lot of patience to wait for him to finish a very small meal ... nevertheless, its good enough if he wants to eat, there are times he simply refuses everything! and because he refuses so many things (though we keep on giving him in all sort of varieties), ummi resort back to the old baby food - and found some interesting ones at Boots (a better range than ASDA i think) ... from bread sticks, to fruit juices and puree ... the first two seems to work fine though it still takes time to finish one stick and half a bottle of juice, but the puree is not challenging enough for babies with teeth I guess ... oh ya, mama asked us to try giving him yoghurt (doc said its good for him when he has a fever too) and guess what? we bought it and he lovesss it! alhamdulillah ... (*feeding tip from UmmAzzam - little and often - sounds like meal intake during pregnancy?)

when we first started solids for him (about 6-7 months of his age), he used to sit quietly and open his mouth waiting for the spoon to come in, whether he will later pull a face to show dislike or whether he'll make some "ah" "ah" sounds asking for more - meaning he loves it, but now he will usually turn around, or nod his head or simply take out his two little hands to push the spoon or bowl to the floor when anything feels wrong on his tastebuds or whenever he has enough ...
feeding to this "early-learners" is expected to be a messy task, whether you feed them or moreover when you're teaching them to self-feed ...

betul tak kalau dikatakan, malay mothers usually feed their child and rarely do the latter at a very early age? maybe because we're used to the idea of feeding our children on our laps, on the floor and the concept of high-chairs, booster-seats-and-child-joining-the-dining-table (too long a term :D) is still a bit foreign to our kampung and also town folks ... it's just one of those things we don't really do/bother of and maybe because such accessories to accompany this kind of training cost a lot/are expensive back home in Malaysia ... well, for now, i don't really think there's any harm in it - but the good side of this training is that we'll help our child to coordinate his senses and body parts (hands-eyes) and instill confidence by being self-sufficient and independent ... furthermore, time for "food" is very much social time for the family, where everyone sits to enjoy the meal and share their bit of the day with each other ...

the first time we went to see the Health Visitor at the university's clinic, she told us to cut off baby biscuits and simply give him family food (mashed or made chewable to him) - pasta, lasagne etc. - and more protein, to help him gain enough nutrients and sleep restfully ... it reminds me of sis Baiti's lil' Aufa who loves only what her parents eat, not those "special" homemade meals made exclusively for her! same goes to this young man, he's tempted with what goes into our mouths rather than the "strange" things he has in his own special bowl ... "why must I have these when everyone else isn't?" ... he no longer wants to eat bubur nasi or plain vege-chicken soup eventhough you put all the nicest things in it! the idea actually worked for some time ... he lovesssss pasta, shepherd's pie, mashed potatoes and all those non-spicy western cuisines ... it is also a blessing for ummi not having to cook two separate meals daily for the family alhamdulillah, but unfortunately, ummi and abi prefer hot and spicy food because we are malaysians :) and sometimes the dull-tasting western meals bored us!

bukan ciplak, tapi ...

2005-12-25T02:09:00.000-08:00

I've once read MY OWN writing/poem posted on a blog with its complete content from A to Y ... err Y? because the Z is the part I put my pen name on and it was gone!

Satu hari terdetik di hati, menjenguk ruangan puisi di Portal Muslimah, been there b4, but i didn't have much interest in such forums ... tapi hari itu ana membelek hampir seluruh koleksi karya puisi/sajaknya ... and guess what i've found?

another piece of MINE! and again, without my pen name at the end of it ... tapi nama entah siapa pula kali ini ... yg lucu, puisi yg sama dikirim dua nama berbeza ... satu oleh A, satu oleh B ...

dan semalam abuhandzalah (oh ya he's back to blogspot.com) "mengejutkan", beria-ia "menunjukkan" another poem that's mine di BT (he's a regular visitot there) dan sekali lagi ...!!

yang tambah "menggembirakan" it has been altered - dgn lafz yg salah (pulakkk...)?

papar tanpa izin dan kredit kepada penulis asal?
papar tanpa izin dengan nama lain/sendiri?
tukar dan papar tanpa izin dan kredit kepada penulis asalnya?

tanpa etika? atau tak hairanlah? banyak lagi penulis maya yg menjadi mangsa ciplak? curi dan sebagainya ... setakat satu dua tulisan kita "terkena", biasalah ye?

sekadar kepelikan ...
kalau dikata budaya copy, paste & forward antara sebabnya - ana tertanya-tanya - kenapa boleh copy seluruh isi dengan meninggalkan hanya satu baris nama, atau kenapa perlu bersusah-payah cut yg sebaris itu atau tukar namanya kalau kesempatan hanya utk CPF cuma?
ALlah Maha Tahu, ana tak tahu juga ...

ana izinkan kalau ada manfaatnya utk dikongsi, tapi hormatilah "harta intelek" (ataupun bagi ana - suara, rasa dan daya hati dan minda) seseorang sepertimana mereka menghormati keinginan anda untuk membaca, menyimpan atau memaparnya ...

dulu ana ada letak Creative Commons License di blog sodeeq, tapi sejak sodeeq down dan perpindahan demi perpindahan berlaku ... i've lost it somehow ... 'ala kulli haal, sesama kita yg namanya muslimah atau muslim, rasanya tak perlu musykilah bab akhlaaqiyat ini diruncingkan melaui aspek undang-undang sebegini ... unless, kita sedang menderita penyakit hati ... na'uzubillah!

tak berniat memburukkan sesiapa, malah website yg ana mention in this post pun mungkin menjadi mangsa gejala CPF membabi buta ni ...

mohon maaf salah dan silap, sekadar memohon anda memulangkan hak saya sebagai seorang manusia apalagi sebagai seorang Muslim khususnya ...

bukan kerna nama apalagi puji ...

p/s: bisik2 minda:
[1] tulisan pakdi lagikan dicuri di media cetak... siapalah aku?
[2] eh...boleh tahan popular jugak ye? (joking :D)
[3] kalau nak CPF with alterations tanpa izin pun buatlah elok-elok sikit, biar nampak real dan berkaliber ... err! :P

:)

2005-12-24T11:43:00.000-08:00

a piece of my mind, a piece of my heart

2005-12-23T01:31:00.000-08:00

was talking to uncle T @3-4a.m (I think) this morning - while "waiting" for "my cute little baby" Handzalah to fall asleep (this is nearly a daily routine already, allahumma yassir) ... he wanted to call us then but I told him that abuhandzalah was sleeping and I don't want to wake him up since the computer is in the bedroom .. so he replied: "those days you're kid now you are real mother.."

an answer I didn’t expect yet I’ve received so many times – alike – since motherhood begins … remembered my cousin telling my aunts how much I’ve grown and lost my childishness (well I was VERY emotional I guess) …

my my...how time flies and how much I've missed all those moments - being a child ... once, I've thought of not growing up at all! (huhu..I don't want to grow up, I'm a toys r us kid! ;)) err, that's impossible of course ... samalah seperti satu ketika dulu I don't think I'll ever get married ... I'll live this life to my old age - kalau ada usia - doing what I do best (apa tu?), further my studies (not in the 'normal' way though) and take care of my parents till the day I die ... but things changed, so do I …

I enjoy being a daughter to my beloved mama and papa, a sister to all my siblings (that's 7 of us - the so called "Sevenlords" :)), a friend to my bestest friends everywhere, anywhere I've ever known them and a servant to the Love of My Life … well, teenage life was hard … aha, that’s what everybody has in common right? Nevertheless, there were ups as there were downs, and great moments of laughter though I might have cried pails of tears, and success more than failure and of course plenty of LOVE that keeps me on my endeavour … I’ve made friends, quite a lot … and some “enemies” too! Huhu I didn’t plan that … I didn’t have much enjoyed my campus life though because I had too little time “around” the location itself – I’ve spent so much time with my family … and I thought that was toooo much, a lot then … but now it’s like I’ve never had enough! And maybe that was and is the best thing that has ever happened in my life … I have the greatest people loving and caring for me from the minute I came into this world until today mashaAllah …

from a child and a daughter I’ve grown to a lady/woman (uh uh…that sounds odd!), a wife and a mother to my own lovely child! That takes 23 years to happen but now it feels like a blink of an eye … childhood, teenage and campus life, marriage and now motherhood … we walk through this life everyday with a different view of life itself as we learn and experience what life is all about … through different roles and opportunities … I’ve been blessed! With knowledge, and with love … alhamdulillah!

I might be nobody to the whole world but I believe that my family has taught me the most precious thing in life, and that, makes me a person equally unique and special as everyone else … cinta membutuhkan pengorbanan … whether its love to the Creator or His creations … manifesting the real essence of love takes a lot of courage and strength to sacrifice … you sacrifice the world in order to gain aakhirah, you sacrifice your pleasures to fulfill the needs of others … my mother sacrificed everything for me and my family, and still she struggles to make others’ life a better one each and every day she has lived and lives …

my baby was sick for more than three days and I was so worried and hurt … I couldn’t do anything to make him well except calming him down when he’s crying so hard due to the pain and discomfort and give him his medication as prescribed by the doc … I sang him lullabies and let him sleep in my arms through the night … and I prayed for Allah’s might to make him well again so that he could easily laugh, smile and play again to cure my aching heart …

Such days remind me of my mama … how much she has suffered in great pain not only to deliver all of us … but furthermore – to take care all the seven of us – with different characters, likes and dislikes … dealing with our problems, big and small … seeing and nursing us in sickness and on the hospital bed …

it reminds me of every single thing I could remember that she had done to nurture and ‘cure’ our spirits so that we’ll appreciate His blessings and survive the challenges in life …

the day she left us at school and we cried, she didn’t … and she didn’t come back for us until it is time for us to go back … but if we call her in need of something or when we did things wrongly or when we’ve given up … she’ll pick us up in our weakest moments … she held our hands without feeling ashamed when we ourselves couldn’t face the burden of shame ourselves … she’ll say try again and she’ll do everything to get us back on our own two feet …

and she told me to hang on, and that I can do it … the day I thought I will never survive the game of life and that I’ll lose to the sickness and succumbed to death … I cried hearing her say that because I thought at that very second I’ve failed her when she never failed us … I cried … and I cried …

……………………………. But I’ve survived that biiznillah wa bihamdihi … I’ve survived for His never-ending love and forgiveness … for the strength that she breathed into my soul and for the courage she believed I posses … she believes in me, therefore, I’ve learnt to believe in myself …

and thank you Allah for blessing me with another companion who believes in me … who helped me to survive those moments I shall never forget … who trusted me with love and great responsibilities though my two hands are small, he always believed I will be able to do these things right …

sekerdil dan sefakir ini ... aku!

2005-12-16T09:10:00.000-08:00

masa berlalu.

manusia berubah, dan apabila bercakap fasal perubahan orang selalu fokus ttg - perubahan dr kebaikan kpd keburukan ...

cuma yg menjadi tanda tanya - macamana pula dgn yg sebaliknya?

i've tried my best to figure out why oh why?

makanya aku cuba melihat tabiat sendiri, ada tak yg dari elok, suci, murni asalnya dikurnia Pencipta, aku cemarkan jd buruk dan hodoh pula ...

dan malangnya aku ini manusia yang lupa (ahh... lupakah atau saja melupakan!) maka ...
ADA!!!

astaghfirullah, mungkin terlalu banyak pula ...

but how and why?

bila ku fikirkan segala asbab dan alasannya - "nafsu kah? syaitan kah? ahhh aku lagi kan diperdaya dunia!" maka hasilnya adalah asbab dan ALASAN SEMATA-MATA! Excuses!! How could we live a day without them eh?! :(

Sayang ... hari menghadap Tuhan bisakah lagi bermain alasan? kerna nafsu, kerna syaitan ... bahkan akulah yg terpedaya dan akhirnya menanggung beban ... dosa, noda -tangan inilah yg membuatnya, telinga inilah yg mendengarnya, mata inilah yg melihatnya, fikir inilah, hati inilah ... yg tercemar, yg terhina ... bila syaitan jadi teman di dunia ...

tapi ahh... temankah dia??

[Quran 8:48 Remember Satan made their (sinful) acts seem alluring to them, and said: "No one among men can overcome you this day, while I am near to you": But when the two forces came in sight of each other, he turned on his heels, and said: "Lo! I am clear of you; lo! I see what ye see not; Lo! I fear Allah. for Allah is strict in punishment."]

BAHKAN! Syaitan takut pdNYA ...

dan aku dari tanah dan mani yg hina masih lalai, selesa dgn kemegahan dosa!

Allah Allah Allah :(

oh Allah don't leave me to myself,
alone ... I shall fade away

oh Allah don't leave me to myself,
alone ... I shall go astray!

allahummaghfirlana ...

moga istiqamah ...

2005-12-12T23:03:00.000-08:00

alhamdulillah kami sekeluarga kini telah selamat menjadi musafir di perantauan ... asifah kerana belum dapat menghidupkan blog ini kembali ... will make a comeback soon inshaAllah ...

jazakumullah khayral jazaa'

di mana anda?

2005-08-06T06:17:00.000-08:00

di mana anda malam ini? pada saat ini?

saya di F1 menaip ini, mungkin untuk anda tapi sememangnya pasti untuk diri sendiri!

di mana anda kini?

adakah di pejabat? atau di rumah?

sedang makan? chatting? atau sedang menyertai ribuan (atau jutaan?) peminat Akademi Fantasia meraikan konsert finale malam ini??! Isk...isk... mungkin jika rumah saya punyai pancaran Astro, atau mungkin jika saya tidak canggung menonton televisyen di warung-warung atau restoran yang bersiaran Astro ... saya juga akan bersama mereka saat ini!!!

Isk...isk...isk...Tuhan, begitu lemahnya hati!

Saya khuatir, mungkin dahulu kegilaan AF tidak sampai kepada sebegitu ramai manusia (dah RAMAIIIIlah juga sebenarnya!) tapi selepas gelombang TSUMAWI ... saya dan anda DI MANA KINI??!

saya merasakan AF adalah antara gelombang yang sangat besar melanda bukan saja muda-mudi malah yg tua dan kecil-kecil cili padi di negara kita kini ... (bukan AF saja malah sekian banyak program realiti tv). mungkin ramai yang telah menulis tentang negatifnya gelombang ini, tapi sejauh mana hakikat "buruk"-nya kegilaan ini bisa menjauhkan saya dan anda dari menanti pelajar-pelajar AF setiap hari di depan tv?

Kehadiran MAWI di AF dan dalam "kehidupan" kita kini mengingatkan saya tentang YASIN dan migrasinya dalam industri muzik. Adakah ia sekadar satu perubahan imej dan genre muzik serta keinginan untuk menjadi artis solo setelah lama dalam dunia nasyid? Tak perlu tepuk dada mencari jawabnya, cuma perlu fikir, zikir dan penghayatan iman dalam amal sehari-hari. Tapi "cuma" itu bukan mudah dan memerlukan mujahadah yg bukan sedikit.

Gelombang TSUMAWI - antara hijrah dan fitnah yang perlu kita analisa sedalam-dalamnya hari ini ...

ANDA DI MANA KINI?

Saya harap anda sedang bersama saya yang sedang cuba memenangi perlawanan nafsu hari ini >>> menjauhi gelombang TSUMAWI/AF!!Kerana jika "MEREDAH"-nya saya khuatir kita akan lemas meskipun "perasan" kita punya survival skills untuk mengasingkan segala elemen-elemen munkar dari apa yang kita tonton dan dengar setiap hari!

Sekadar nota untuk yang seperti saya hari ini. Hanya ALlah Maha Mengetahui :)

kembali ke F1 ...

2005-06-18T01:15:00.000-08:00

hari ini, selepas lebih setahun, kembali posting dr meja pejabat abuhandzalah di F1. tapi kali ini datang bersama handzalah, bukan berdua lagi :). handzalah dah suka duduk dlm stroller bolehlah ummi+abi bawa jalan lama-lama sikit. tapi kena gerakkan stroller tu, kalau lama-lama sangat statik boringla dia. kalau naik kereta lagi boring. dr BP kalau nak balik rumah Opah sampai 3 jam, handzalah memang tak tahan. dlm mag parenting ada cakap kalau travel dgn anak-anak atau kanak-kanak kena berhenti, rancang perjalanan baik-baik. bahagikan masa untuk berehat supaya mereka tak terlalu letih dan bosan. make your journey fun and exciting, bak kata Opah time travel ni time nak tengok alam semesta ciptaan al-Khaliq yg indah dan luas, time kita nak tengok tempat dan budaya orang. Jangan asyik tidur! (tu untuk akak, abang, mak & bapak kepada budak-budak).

alhamdulillah minggu lepas sempat ke walimah akh Hafiz bec4, dptlah jumpa sahabat-sahabat kesayangan. datang dah dekat pukul 4, mulanya ingat tak sampai sebab handzalah dah meragam on the way. terpaksa berhenti kat seremban sekejap dalam pukul 2 lebih. syukurlah sempat juga sampai, dapat jumpa bee, kak ruq & family, sue & siblings, pengantin (mestilah!), fiza a.k.a adik pengantin dan penampilan istimewa hasnor nadia a.k.a sepupu pengantin merangkap peminat zaman dolu-dolu huhuhu :) (apa tu?). oh! lagi satu special appearance - ukht Siti Muslimah & parents ... classmate masa sek. rendah yg dah lama x jumpa ... adalah sekali kot masa gathering batch few years back. LAGI SATU, dapatlah Handzalah jumpa Amaani Syaheeda for the second time, kali ni Amaani tak tidur :). Luk pegang Amaani yg comel rasa alah comelnya! kecik je ... ringan, kecik dari Handzalah. Handzalah 3 bulan = 6kg lebih, Amaani baru nak masuk 5kg dan muda sebulan, tu yg ringan tu :) plus, Amaani girl, biasanya org kata girl ni kecil sikit saiznya berbanding boys ...

oklah, handzalah dah ajak balik ;) tak boleh lama-lama sangat kat sini nanti 'melekat'.

atrukukum fihifzillahi wa ri'ayatihi, hingga lain masa ... wassalam! :)

cerita apa ye?

2005-05-16T23:50:00.000-08:00

back @mama's place, too many interesting happenings yet none have been written down, none ... not ye kot :) (tapi esok dah nak balik). belek-belek email & blogs, baru sempat nak taip a few words on this blog today...

oh ye! Happy Birthday to Joode 'Arasy (pronounced Jud) and kak Jules, 16 & 19 May 2000, dan SELAMAT HARI GURU to my PARENTS, ZAUJ, SIBLINGS & dedicated TEACHERS everywhere they are ... semalam join NIZ buat souvenir utk cikgu-che'gu sekolah Zak ... lama betul tak buat kraftangan, 'keras tangan' jadinya. 'Ala kulli haal, hopefully cikgu-che'gu Zak akan gembira with our little gifts ... cikgu-che'gu yg kecil gajinya tapi besar hati & semangatnya! Macam cikgu-che'gu luk once upon a time :) rindunya pd suasana itu! :)

to mokcik el, nak citer apa tentang handzalah ye? Alhamdulillah, handzalah sihat-sihat saja ... dah 2 bulan setengah, tapi orang yg ziarah tengok kata tak macam 2 bulan, macam dah besar, dah cerdik dah ;) alhamdulillah ... handzalah suka sembang ... kalau bercakap dgn dia terkumat-kamit mulutnya bunyi "akok", "ooo" "aah" ... cuba tengok pic kt bawah Handzalah tgh sembang dgn toksu :) :

ilham...

2005-04-06T22:16:00.000-08:00

yang di atas kertas
yang di bawah pena
bisa hilang
jauh melayang
bila tak berada di tengah-tengah!

biar melimpah
mencurah-curah
TIADA
tak bermakna
tanpa saksi kewujudannya!

k-e-w

"ilmu tanpa amal ibarat pokok yang tidak berbuah" - pepatah Arab

26 years, 27 days

2005-03-28T01:09:00.000-08:00

nota Ahad, 27 Mac 2005

:)
selamat hari lahir.
semoga ALlah memberkati dan merahmati usiamu yang lalu, hari ini dan yang akan datang ...

"akan ku terus mengiringmu,
bersama tempuh ranjau dan rindu,
ku sertai doa dan harapan,
SELAMAT HARI LAHIR UNTUKMU" - abuhandzalah

jazakumullah khairal jazaa' to my family for their nice thoughts and 'susah payah' to make yesterday a beautiful memory.

handzalah ...

2005-03-21T00:39:00.000-08:00

tiba dalam dakap ummi & abi
pada 20 Muharram 1426 - 1 Mac 2005
jam 10:24 pagi

subhanallah, walhamdulillah, wa laa ilaaha illallah, wallahu AKBAR!

---

* moga dikau jadi kekasihNya yang setia, hamba yang sejati.

* ALlah yang memberi, ALlah yang mengambil kembali, ALlah yang mencipta hidup dan mati sebagai ujian buat kita di dunia ini.

* Allah mengujimu, aku dan kita semua ... semua kerna cintaNYA, demi cintaNYA ... siapa yang akan memenanginya?

Allahummahdina, allahumma yassir umurana ... ALLAH AL-WALIYY!

sketsa kehidupan

2005-02-25T00:47:00.000-08:00

1
ada pertemuan di majlis pernikahan
ada pertemuan meraikan kelahiran
ada pertemuan saat perpisahan nan abadi,
saat kematian menjenguk rumah kita ini ...

* al-Fatihah buat nenda kami yang telah pergi menemuiMU Rabbi ( 23/02/2005). Moga ruhmu dicucuri rahmatNYA, diam tenang bersama para kekasihNYA, di taman keindahan abadi selama-lamanya...

pertemuan belum tentu mengundang senyum gembira
perpisahan dan kematian
belum tentu ada airmata duka dan sengsara
(telah lama ku relakan pemergiannya!)

2
aku melihat dunia jadi kecil
aku melihat dunia jadi bisu
aku melihat dunia yang keliru
masih tak mampu ...
menghadam beza
hitam, putih, kelabu

i
aku bertemu dia
aku bertemu kamu
aku bertemu yang dikenal, dicinta,
yang sudah terlupa ...
yang buat-buat tak tahu
(atau tak betah bersua?)

satu kematian mengembalikan pertemuan
sayang ...
jika persaudaraan tetap kehilangan
kenapa begitu mahal harga kemaafan
menyembuh ikatan kasih persaudaraan
(perlukah maut jadi tukaran?)

ii
aku melihat hidup sirna
lama sebelum Izrail menunaikan tugasnya
hidup dan mati jadi tak berbeda
saat iman dan taqwa hilang dari jiwa

aku melihat hidup sirna
lama sebelum ruh meninggalkan jasadnya
bila sekujur tubuh tak lagi membutuhkan dunia
tak perlu pada makan dan minum
tak endah akan apa yang dipakai
tak bimbang hari panas atau hujan ribut
tak ingin lagi pada harta dan keindahan
tak perlu lagi pada suara dan kebebasan

hidup sudah jadi kosong
hati tak lagi ingin pada dunia
rajuk, sedih, lemah dan murung
jiwa sudah lama lesu,
kering dan kontang
tiada lagi hujan kasih
hatta awan harap pun berarak hilang!

mendambakan kasih manusia ...
tragedi hidup yang amat menyiksakan!

iii
aku menginginkan kematian
jadi bidayah sebuah kehidupan
sepertimana matinya para syuhadaa'
dan saaliheen
untuk memulakan hayat yang baru
jauh dari dunia yang keliru
meninggalkan segala derita dan sengsara
menempati taman al-Khaliq nan indah serba-serbinya
aman, damai, tenang, bahagia
dalam redha dan meredhai selama-lamanya!

moga aku melihat
dengan mata hati yang suci
kerna,
aku tak ingin keliru
tak mahu pada dunia yang keliru
aku hanya inginkan naungan hidayah, lindungan cinta dan redhaMU!

* allahummaj'alna min 'ibaadikas-saaliheen ... allahummaj'al hayaatana hayaatal ulaama', waj'al mautana mauta asy-syuhadaa' ...

khaleel el-wafy
250204 1742pm

anak ummi & abi II

2005-02-22T00:13:00.000-08:00

ummi nantikan hari ini
lebih dari segala hari-hari yang lain
namun Tuhan Maha Mengetahui
kenapa harus terbit mentari
bersama cahaya penantian semalam ...

abi jua menanti
sejak awal menemani ummi
malam dan pagi memanggilmu ke mari
hadirlah anak abi & ummi
hadirlah, sungguh kami merindui
namun ALlah saja Maha Mengerti
rahsia kehadiranmu ke alam fana ini

ummi & abi ...
sentiasa mendu'akan kesejahteraanmu
hadirlah dalam rahmat Tuhan Yang Menciptakan
moga mentari kan bersinar cemerlang
mengakhiri penantian yang menyulam kesabaran
dalam meniti perjalanan kehidupan
berteduh kasih dipayung cinta ar-Rahman

EDD 22/2/2005
1623pm